SERIOUSLY. This is what the crap Hollywood still puts out?

From my favorite movies..

if their story seems completely bonkers, almost like a feverish work of fiction, you ain't heard nothing yet.

While it doesn't offer any answers, it both thrills and makes you think.

When Bob Clampett left the WB cartoon studio in the spring of 1945, he left a few projects unfinished. Schlesinger had recently sold the studio to WB and fellow director, Frank Tashlin had also departed a few months earlier, also leaving a few projects unfinished. There has been discussion for years as to the circumstances surrounding the timing of Clampett's departure and WB acquisition of the studio, but that's another story.As most fans know, most cartoons left unfinished by their intended director usually end up very messy in terms of consistency. Of the projects Clampett left unfinished, Bacall To Arms is the messiest. It uses a lot of footage from an earlier WB cartoon "She Was An Acrobat's Daughter". The use of footage from a late 30's cartoon mixed in with a mid 40's cartoon and soundtrack makes this short look very jarring. I wonder if this short also had trouble with the censors, as some of the wolf's reactions appear to be cut short.I've also wondered what Clampett's intended vision was for this short was had he stayed to complete it. In addition to parodying To Have And Have Not, via movie screen, could the wolf have been a tribute to Tex Avery? Given that any official records have been lost to time, we may never know.While this shorts redeems itself with some great Scribner and Gould animation, this short barely constitutes as a Clampett masterpiece.

A first-class, extremely well done spoof cartoon, its high quality being very typical of the time. Audiences back then were more sophisticated than the audiences today, fed as they are on the rubbish that Hollywood flings out with abandon. They were more appreciative of charm and wit and recognized it when they saw it. BACALL TO ARMS has charm and wit and is deliciously funny from start to finish.Animation fans will particularly enjoy the superb work of the Warner artists and the breakneck speed of the pacing. Writing, directing, music and editing are all as good as can be.One of the great cartoons, definitely not to be missed.

"Bacall to Arms" is a true relic of cinema-going in the 1940s. It portrays a movie theater where several things happen. After the audience plays an over-the-top version of musical chairs, a wolf ogles a sexy usherette (is it PC to use that word?), and a big fat guy can't sit down.Then, the "Warmer News" reel tells of how radars are helping ordinary Americans...by alerting when mothers-in-law are coming. And finally, the feature: "To Have, To Have, To Have, To Have, To Have" starring Bogey Gocart and Laurie Bee Cool. Bogey tells the big fat guy in the audience to sit, and then his female co-star enters. As the two stars carry out their routine, the wolf's hormones go through the roof (you gotta admit, with how she talks and acts, it's hard not to get sexually aroused). It all builds up, resulting in a rather cringe-inducing finale.Above all, I think that it's good that I first saw this cartoon now, when I'm old enough to understand what it portrays. Had I watched this when I was a little kid, I probably wouldn't have gotten any of it (seriously, how many six-year-old children can identify Humphrey Bogart and Lauren Bacall?). Especially neat is to think about how cool it was that they managed to portray such sexuality in the 1940s. But hey, the Looney Tunes/Merrie Melodies cartoons were always pushing the limits (and the ones directed by Bob Clampett took contortionist phantasmagoria/wackiness to the extreme).So anyway, you're sure to like this one, despite a rather non-PC ending. I suspect that Humphrey and Lauren were probably flattered.

We are taken back to the movie theater in the '40s where people are playing musical chairs, wolves are making passes at beautiful usherettes, and the "warmer news" movie short is showing, explaining how "American industry cleverly adapts the implements of war to peace time use." We then see clever and funny ways radar is now being used in post-war 1946.Then, the feature movie begins with "Bogey Gocart and Laurie Bee Cool in Too-Have, Too- Have, Too-Have and Too-Have." In between this animated take-off of the famous film, "To Have And Have Not," we see what's happening in the theater such as a Hippo barging his way in front of people and "Bogey" telling him, "Hey, Fat Boy. If you want to see how this picture ends, sit down!" We see the wolf going nuts whenever "Laurie" is on screen, etc.Man, the humor was corny back then (but fun to watch in these old cartoons).