Charming and brutal

A Disappointing Continuation

Good films always raise compelling questions, whether the format is fiction or documentary fact.

Excellent characters with emotional depth. My wife, daughter and granddaughter all enjoyed it...and me, too! Very good movie! You won't be disappointed.

Seriously, just the idea of a remake of the 1974 horror classic "Black Christmas" was already laughable in itself. I mean, was this remake really needed? The original movie was largely sufficient. But still, I decided to give it a shot, hoping that it would be somewhat entertaining. Except that Glen Morgan gave birth to a terribly bland and boring horror movie, and to a horribly bad remake of "Black Christmas". The acting was mediocre, and each of the actors failed to give a slightly compelling performance. The directing doesn't even try to have some creativity and its weakness does a huge disservice to the murder scenes, which, I have to recognize, benefit from pretty solid gore FX, and they could have been more enjoyable if Glen Morgan's directing wasn't as dull. As for the characters, without any surprise, they're not even slightly interesting and have very little backstory, and the screenplay isn't much better, caring more about giving an unnecessary and unoriginal backstory to its killers, destroying any cloud of mystery that could surround them. So as you guessed, that movie was a bad movie and a terrible remake: if you wanna get really scared, go for the original movie. If you're a gorehound, well, seek another movie, because this movie won't satisfy you.

I watched the original film for the first time not too long ago and really enjoyed it. I saw the 2006 installment right when it came out but couldn't really remember it. I'm very into horror films though so I decided it was time for a rewatch to see if this could be more enjoyable the second time around. I do like horror movies revolving around a holiday, it doesn't happen that often but it really should.This film is a loose remake of the original, that takes place in a sorority house. The film follows a group of girls who are being hunted down by a yellow skinned killer named Billy Lenz. He is a murdered who broke out of prison and is looking for his sister at the same house the girls currently inhabit. The film becomes a slasher film where the body count increases while the blood is splattered everywhere.The film is very violent. Eyes get gauged out, heads get pierced, multiple stabbing occurs, heads roll, its all very bloody. Its not very holiday friendly but who the hell cares. If you are squeamish during these types of films, this won't be for you. The story isn't really exactly strong, there aren't any really scary moments, nor is the end something groundbreaking or unpredictable. The film follows conventional horror tropes and norms when you really get past the ultra violent nature.Overall, its a throwaway film and not really anything you'll be visiting during Christmas or Halloween for that matter. The film does offer a nice cast of pretty ladies (loving me some Mary Elizabeth Winstead) and good violence. Its predictable and generic but you get some bloody fun out of it, which is the intention of this film. No need to compare to the original, let it stand on its own.6/10

Cast list sounds good. Katie Cassidy is very much in demand with me, what with TAKEN, MELROSE PLACE and MONTE CARLO. Michelle Trachtenberg is the darling Dawn from quintessential favorite BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER, so this one I had to see. I knew that being a horror movie, it was going to get gory, but OK, I got myself the DVD.Big mistake.Let me count the ways.(1) While Katie Cassidy's character Kelli takes a while to get going (it seemed like a lost cause during the first half), Mary Elizabeth Winstead, the surprise of this movie, is underemployed. Michelle Trachtenberg peaked as Dawn, and in ICE PRINCESS, and just like Lacey PARTY OF FIVE Chabert should never have grown up. (2) It is overpopulated with a cast of what seems like thousands popping up out of the woodwork. They do, however, only exist to be killed off. (3) As characters are killed off right, left, front and center, who the freaking hell cares about them? There is no audience* involvement as we couldn't care less about these characters existing solely to be killed off.(*I am not repeat NOT talking about the kind of "audience" that finds a pornographic thrill out of spattering gore - you guys are lower than dogs and shouldn't have children) (4) This movie is not scary. It only manages to be offensive. It is poorly executed in its way over the top super-violent approach. (5) It is dumb. Well, d-uh! It is for a dumb market, but really, it is dumb, playing only to the type who can slap their knees and go chortle-chortle fit to wet themselves as a young girl gets her eyes poked out.I am not against showing a terrorized little bunny cowering in a corner as some dark hideous force bears down upon her. As a writer of several stories, sort of like movies in my mind, I would delve into psychological horror and the stuff I would have running amok on the screen would scare you lot silly. It would offend a great many of you. But it wouldn't be such an abattoir, and my heroine is somebody who is an absolute joy to behold, and she's somebody to root for as she scrambles for a way out. Granted, I cannot share this with IMDb, that is my tragedy stuck out in a dead part of the world, but these Hollywood people are in a position to produce better quality work AND YET THEY FOCUS ON SUCH MINDLESS DRIVEL as this heartless remake reveling in what I find disgusting in an offensive way.To me, a horror movie should evoke the response of wanting to grab the pretty heroine and shield her from that unspeakable evil. Yeah, old school, I suppose, but a better school, I proudly insist. You lot revel in the delight of seeing her carved up. My score of 1 -10* especially reflects that with what they had here, something much better could have been made. I fully understand that there are lots of people out there who are quite happy with this kind of stuff. Which is why the world is in such a sad and sorry state. *in the interest of being fair, I've upped it to 3 - 10A life really isn't worth two cents to you if this is your guilty pleasure. Think about that. Your poor children...

Some actress who didn't even deserve any lines gets whacked in her room at her sorority house. Meanwhile, the jaundiced lunatic who used to live in said house escapes the loony bin because people who work in those places were educated at community colleges instead of real schools.Back at the house, the girl who plays NOT-Tina Gray from the Nightmare on Elm Street remake and her douchey-looking boyfriend talk about things no one cares about before NotTina heads inside. Throughout the exposition we're introduced to Dana, played by Gretchen Wiener, the house-biotch Lauren, Megan(holy crap, this is a sorority girl? she looks 40!), Heather, played by Wendy from Final Destination 3(I guess she had what she gets in this film coming then, huh), some weirdo Eve, Harriet-the-Spy, and house mother Ms. Mac, whom I'm going to refer to as Aunt Voula from because Phyllis already died in the original. And this film has nothing if not continuity. Megan, the 40-year-old, gets interrupted by watching porn of herself(probably checking which part of her body needs to be surgically-enhanced next) and goes to investigate the attic where she discovers victim number 1 from the opening scene, and also gets whacked. I should probably make note that the killer's preferred method of murdering these trashy chicks is to be a trash bag over their head and gouge/stab out their eye/s. I'd make a joke about putting trash-in-trash bag, but I think it speaks for itself.Downstairs, our Sorority Sisters start receiving phone calls from Billy the Killer harassing them and getting all "F*** Santa." No one cares.Oh and then Miss Lewton from Final Destination shows up looking for the mute who has been murdered, claiming to be her sister. Dana thinks Miss Lewton's coat is SO. FETCH. But that's not til after we're treated to flashbacks shot by someone inspired by Quentin Tarantino and Tim Burton who just happens to lack the talent. I'm not talking about the flashbacks after this because this film could've done without. Honestly, I had enough to laugh at already.NotTina's skeezy boyfriend shows up at some point and NotTina discovers the house slut's sex tape was with the bastard. Apparently it's bad enough that he had sex with anyone before they got together, but in an age of Paris Hiltons and Kim Karsluttians, he filmed it for funsies and it leaked. NotTina is starting to come across as a frigid hypocrite. I hope she dies. Heather investigates Eve's room after she supposedly leaves and instead of death getting her by dropping a damn shelf on her head or something, she discovers damning evidence in her closet. It was at this point that I asked my boyfriend "Why didn't she turn on a light?" And he told me the power went out. I was probably checking Instagram while that happened and didn't notice. Anywho, Harriet-the-Spy has been taking care of the house bitch Lauren as she becomes the house drunk Lauren and tells her to hop in the shower so the straight males of the audience can see some side-boob as Billy spies through a hole. House Bitch/Drunk Lauren goes to bed. I really wish Harriet-the-Spy was our main character. It would've been much better than NotTina and her ice-cold vagina anyway.Then the body count starts mounting fairly quickly. Dana was trying to make Snark happen while she investigated strange noises underneath the house and Billy decides to take Regina's cattiness to the next level and gets her in the head with a gardening tool. Another threatening phone call sends the girls outside to check on Dana where they instead discover Eve decapitated in her car.After some of the most successful calls for help in a slasher film, Aunt Voula and Heather/Wendy bitch their way out through the storm to the car. While Aunt Voula is scraping ice off the windshield, Heather/Wendy finally dies after surviving Final Destination 3. You might think Billy killed her, but I like to pretend a frozen pipe inside the car cracked and the anti-freeze caused a reaction that propelled the vent to shoot out of the fan and lodge itself in Heather/Wendy's carotid artery. Aunt Voula backs her stupid self into a garage door and gets impaled with an icicle. That's cute.Harriet-the-Spy forgets the sleuthing skills she has in the mid-90s and nearly gets garbage bagged by Billy. She does manage to get away, but when she decides she should just whack him with a ski pole a few times instead of STABBING HIM WITH THE SHARP END, it becomes clear that however awesome she is, she's not going to survive. And thus our favorite character gets an ice skate to the back of the head.Sleeping house bitch/drunk then gets molested and stabbed in the eyes.So we're left with NotTina and Miss Lewton running into the douche- boyfriend and make their way to the attic where Agnes, Billy's sister-daughter, kills the boyfriend while the other 2 discover all of the corpses..Miss Lewton falls through a hole in the floor while NotTina gets pulled in between the walls. Miss Lewton finds NotTina and pulls her through the wall before setting fire to Agnes and Billy. Anyway.At the hospital, Miss Lewton opens the mute's present, the ugliest effing watch I've ever seen, before a nurse comes to inform NotTina that the doctor's want to run another X-Ray now. What? NotTina slid between walls. Miss Lewton's the one who fell a WHOLE FLOOR AND GOT KNOCKED OUT. The people working at this hospital must've gone to the same community college as the people who work at the loony bin.Billy and Agnes then come snap Miss Lewton's neck. NotTina returns, electrocutes Agnes, and then is chased down the hospital halls by Billy before getting him impaled on a tree. Fabulous.5 stars out of 10.MERRY Christmas!