Crooked
Crooked
R | 03 August 2006 (USA)
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Two police detectives must protect a beautiful call girl from mob hitmen and a crooked cop.

Reviews
Rijndri

Load of rubbish!!

Grimossfer

Clever and entertaining enough to recommend even to members of the 1%

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Micah Lloyd

Excellent characters with emotional depth. My wife, daughter and granddaughter all enjoyed it...and me, too! Very good movie! You won't be disappointed.

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Brooklynn

There's a more than satisfactory amount of boom-boom in the movie's trim running time.

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The_Phantom_Projectionist

CROOKED (A.K.A. SOFT TARGET) is a film from late in Don Wilson's prime career – that is, from before his hiatus around the turn of the decade. Overall, it goes to show that it wasn't a bad time for him to take a break, not necessarily because he no longer had the stuff but because the DTV action circuit seemed to have left him behind. The movie is weak sauce, for despite its strong supporting cast, it's lacking in style and substance. I'll say it now: this one's for completionists, only.The story: Two police detectives – Tyler (Wilson) and Yordan (Olivier Gruner) – are assigned to protect a witness to an underworld murder (Diana Kauffman), but their efforts are hampered by internal corruption.The film's primary selling point is its cast, which also includes Gary Busy, Martin Kove, and Fred Williamson. However, don't get your hopes up: while Wilson and Gruner make the most of their team-up, Williamson and Kove have a combined screen time of maybe five minutes and Busey doesn't even get in on the action. Personally, I was expecting this – Martin Kove has particularly been irritating me for a long time with his reluctance to do fight scenes – but it could be very disappointing to someone who thinks they've come across a B-movie supergroup. That's not to take away from the memorable performances delivered by lead villain Michael Cavalieri and Martin Morales as a flamboyant pimp, and Gary Busy manages to be memorable, but it's not what viewers wanted to see.Speaking of things unwanted, I'm sorry to say that the movie is ugly in more ways than one. Production-wise, the movie toes the line of an indie feature. The way it's been shot makes me think it had a very rushed schedule: endless nighttime scenes, shaky camera-work, inharmonious editing, and a lot of ADR lines. All of this amplifies the sleazy tone of the story, which really turned me off. Few of the characters are endearing, with Yordan in particular doing all he can for the viewer not to like him. Violence against female characters and sexist dialogue is recurrent. As usual, Don Wison's character is a paragon of morality, but he's on in his own in that regard, amidst all of these other slimy critters. Basically, this isn't the kind of film you watch to put you into a good mood.The same is generally true for the action content, though it has its redeeming qualities and ends up being the one passable aspect of the film. There are four shootouts and five full-length fistfights, and while the former are overlookable, the latter can be decent. Don Wilson and Olivier Gruner don't fight each other and that's pretty disappointing (especially when the film teases it), but they do fight alongside each other and that's pretty cool. A direct comparison favors Gruner: even though both performers are former pro kickboxers and have been listed among the authentic "tough guys" of martial arts movies, Wilson plays his fights very safe with relatively slow choreography and a lot of cuts, whereas Gruner performs a more dynamic and rougher-looking style of brawl that more accurately conveys his real-life strength and ability.CROOKED isn't a film for casual martial arts fans. It *might* pass for a slow night on cable, but that's only if you really want to see the two lead stars and are tolerant about shortcomings.

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Ismaninb

As others have been so negative, I will try to stress the positive sides. Not that there are many. After all I think the movie only worth 3/10. The reason I watched the movie until the end is the reasonably interesting plot. Sure, the director does his utter best to kill that too. Again he fails. Two cops, who dislike each other, have to protect a witness. One member of their homicide team is an informant for the mob leader of the town. The latter wants the witness to be killed and wants the money she knows about. Admit it: this does not sound too bad.Indeed, as a result there are a couple of nice scenes. I mean the the "good cop vs bad cop" trick played on the witness and the quarrels between the two.Being this not a B-movie, but a C-movie at best we cannot expect too much from acting. Fred Williamson did some blaxploitation police stuff in the 70's. It is quite revealing, that he actually is one of the better actors. Gary Busey never rose above D-level. We should be happy, we don't see him too much. But the others really did not annoy me too much. That is quite an achievement in a stupid movie like this.The main culprit is the script - or what was left from it by the director, if we are to believe Wcmartell. It is awful. My conclusion is, that the idea deserves a remake by a skilled director.

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Frank Markland

Don "The Dragon" Wilson and Olivier Gruner star as two cops who protect a hooker from crooked cops, mobsters and pretty much anonymous goons who killed fellow policeman Fred Williamson. Who killed Fred Williamson? The answer is obvious from the first ten minutes and the movie is deadly dull to watch. One of the saddest things is that Olivier Gruner is actually the only one trying, which is sad because he still is the worst actor on a professional level, still despite his hopelessly inept acting he still comes off better than Don 'The Dragon' Wilson who treats this awful material as if he was straining for Oscar contender quality. It is just a ridiculous performance with a complete lack of knowledge of realizing what type of movie he's in. You're not in the movie Heat, Don. The one bright spot is the hilarious portrayal from Gary Busey, who sparkles on would be zen and optimistic B.S that would feel right at home on a midnight telethon. Plus Busey looks undeniably drunk as if he was forced to go without booze for a couple weeks and his strung out look as well as the atrocious dialog is hilarious. It's the film's only enjoyment. And what of those action sequences? Well I would comment on them if I could actually make sense of what was going on in the fight sequences. Don Wilson and Olivier Gruner have always been at least competent at kicking the crap out of people, but with the awful editing and terrible quick cuts that pretty much distance you from getting into the action, one comes to realize that without even 1/3 of the acting talent of Jean-Claude Van Damme or Dolph Lundgren, it becomes obvious that Don may want to just give up the movies if he can't do the required martial arts to sell the concept that he's a tough guy, since the lacking fan-base isn't going to keep buying if this is all The Dragon can come up with. Crooked is about as bad as Seagal's recent efforts (Well I haven't seen anything past Today You Die...) and with movies like Wake Of Death and Russian Specialist out on the shelves, let alone R rated action flicks making a comeback, there is no excuse for unwatchable crap such as this. I'm hoping Olivier Gruner's next movie will be at least funny. Oh and a tip for Don, after seeing Redemption and this, stay away from Art Camacho. I mean seriously I never saw a director who made me pine for the incompetence of Fred Olen Ray. * out of 4-(Bad)

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aloep

My expectations for this weren't high as it was directed by veteran hack Art Camacho and the trailer looked awful. And it was more or less as bad as I expected but I felt compelled to check it out anyway because of the number of well known B-movie stars in the cast. The script is horribly clichéd, "One who lives by the rules, one who lives to break them", Don "The Dragon" Wilson's performance for the most part was terrible and he's starting to move a lot slower with age, his fights are poorly choreographed also. Olivier Gruner has improved quite a bit with time in both his acting and his English and did a passable job in the tired role as the clichéd "play by his own rules" cop. Diana Kauffman is sexy as the protected witness, but that's about all I can say in her favour and it's not remotely convincing when she finds herself attracted to an ageing Don "The Dragon" Wilson.The action is all extremely poor. Much of it consists of small scale shootouts where the bad guys fire, good guys fire back, bad guys fall etc. where in some cases it's difficult to see who's shooting who. The fight scenes aren't good, Olivier Gruner fights much more naturally than Don "The Dragon" Wilson, who's fight scenes are so badly cut that it's very hard to see what's going on. The opening fight scene with him is particularly awful, I could have done better with the right choreographer and he was "arguably the best kickboxer in the world".While a supporting cast of Fred Williamson, Martin Kove and Gary Busey may look appealing on paper it's best to go with the old "Never judge a book by it's cover" in this case. Fred Williamson spends his time in one motel room in the opening scene and is shot after a few minutes. Gary Busey is one of the central characters but spends all of his screen time sitting in an office until towards the end when he walks into a parking lot, gets in a car, turns the key in the ignition and it cuts to a stock footage shot of a BMW exploding in a cobbled street which is very obviously somewhere in Eastern Europe. The shot is taken from Mission Impossible and was shot in Prague, yet this movie is set and filmed in Los Angeles. There are even Ladas and other Eastern European cars visible, not to mention the fact that there aren't even any cobbled streets or historic architecture in LA. You can also clearly see that the car Busey gets into is directly facing a wall. The BMW that explodes is sitting in the middle of a wide cobbled street. The fact that easily spotted errors were left in the film proves how little even the crew cared as you would think that they could have found stock footage which at least matched the location. Martin Kove appears in one scene in the first quarter, then appears at the end only to get shot dead. I've still not worked out a good reason for the existence of this character in the film other than to add a little more B-grade "star power" to the front cover.Two CGI explosions. One mismatched stock footage explosion. Minimal property damage. Several poorly choreographed fight scenes. Lots of boring gunfights.On DVD in the USA now as "Crooked" with a price tag of around $20. Fans of Don "The Dragon" Wilson, Olivier Gruner, Gary Busey, Fred Williamson or Martin Kove may think they're somehow obliged to check it out anyway. I have only got two things to say: "you're not" and "don't". I suggest you avoid it like a bubonic rat.

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