Good movie, but best of all time? Hardly . . .

Crappy film

Admirable film.

The film makes a home in your brain and the only cure is to see it again.

Victor Salva is up to his old tricks in DARK HOUSE, another predictable horror yarn featuring buff young men who invariably disrobe at some point for the role. I'm surprised that Salva still manages to find work in Hollywood, not because of his private indiscretions (to put it mildly), but because his films are just so pitiful. CLOWNHOUSE, the two JEEPERS CREEPERS flicks, they've all been below par and DARK HOUSE is no exception.The house of the title is an ancestral home sought out by a group of faceless teenage types without an ounce of charisma between them. The house has some magical properties including the ability to move at will, but other than that there's little of interest here, apart from the requisite bloodshed. No scares, no atmosphere, just monotony. Lesley-Anne Down has a minor part and there's a nicely complex turn from SAW's Tobin Bell, but otherwise DARK HOUSE is a mess and nothing you've not seen before.

Regardless of what I think of writer/director Victor Salva as a person, I must admit that I really like most of his movies! Fact remains that Salva knows what frightens people. He made some unforgivable mistakes in the past, but really all the felonies that brought him in the news are not my business. My only interest goes out to his directing skills and I can safely say he's one of the few directors out there that approach the horror genre with the right attitude. "Clownhouse" is a very good (and underrated) 80s horror classic, "Nature of the Beast" is vintage 90s thriller material and I do most definitely rank "Jeepers Creepers" (parts I and II) among the best and most genuinely unsettling genre outings of the new millennium. Yes, seriously! I've been waiting for the third film in the series to get released for years now, but production apparently still hasn't started yet! Salva's name hence was my sole motivation to seek out "Dark House", which otherwise just looks like a passable and thirteen-in-dozen backwoods horror movie. This isn't Salva's best work by far, but it definitely still contains a handful of good story ideas, creative plot twists, macabre set pieces and grisly make-up effects. 23-year-old Nick Di Santo is blessed – or burdened – with the supernatural gift of being able to see other people's deaths when he touches them. Nick is also searching for the truth regarding his past, particularly who his father is and where do the recurring nightmares originate from. A traumatic visit to his mother in the asylum teaches Nick that he, in fact, owns a mysterious old house that has vanished in a flood. When he and his friends (including his 8-month-pregnant girlfriend) eventually discover the house, its entrance is blocked by a creepy hermit and an army of axe-wielding and dreadlocked monstrosities… Welcome home, Nick! There are quite a few plot aspects that initially seem strange and rather silly, like the recurring strange voice coming from basements through ventilation holes and frequent references towards Biblical myths as well as towards the number 23 (where have I seen that before…) but eventually they all do make sense. If there's one thing you have to hand to Victor Salva, it's his ability to bring new variations to old clichés (depiction on demons, paradoxes, deserted towns…) and his courage to insert shock-twists and unconventional endings. "Dark House" ("Haunted" is such an awfully mundane title…) contains a couple of nasty killings and bloody make-up effects, but overall I hoped it would have been gorier. Tobin Bell, also the co- producer, gives a good menacing performance and it was particularly a relief to see him in a different role than the tiresome and annoyingly arrogant Jigsaw character! "Dark House" is an enjoyable little side project, Mr. Salva, thank you for that, but now please pull yourself together and start filming "Jeepers Creepers 3: Cathedral"!

All those title changes, how is one supposed to keep track of them? I did watch this movie at a Festival and it was called "Dark House". You can still find it with that title here, but apparently it changed. Maybe the buzz was not so good and they decided to change it to get a fresh clean sheet/start? Who really knows? And who really knows what's up with horror movies starting off strong and getting weaker by the minute ... like this one right here.It's a shame, because the mood this creates at the beginning suggests it would (and could) be stronger than it actually is. But it falls (and fails thereby) into clichés and ridiculous twists, that will leave your head spinning faster than Linda Blairs head in the Exorcist (not in a good way obviously).

I would give this zero stars if I could. Too bad that is not an option.Plot (if you want to call it that): A young man (who clearly didn't graduate from the Stella Adler school of acting) goes to visit his mother at a mental hospital. She tells him that she knows who his father is, but won't tell him who it is. Later the young man inherits a house in the middle of nowhere. He goes looking for his father and takes his best friend and now very pregnant fiancé'/girlfriend/womanherandomlymetinabareightmonthsago to find said house. Bad things happen.Throw in a subplot about being able to see other people's future deaths when you touch them, Tobin Bell from the Saw franchise looking all menacing, a house that somehow has managed to be relocate on its own, weird characters who run around with axes like the nurses from Silent Hill, along with other goofy characters that may or may not be the "bad guys," and you have Dark House.AVOID THIS FILM. Go see other, better, recent straight to video haunted house movies, such as "Haunter" or "Haunt." But do not assume like I did that just because Victor Salva struck gold from directing Jeepers Creepers that he is any good at making movies anymore. He isn't. His career and this pathetic excuse for a movie both belong in the garbage bin.