Very disappointed :(

Truly the worst movie I've ever seen in a theater

A film with more than the usual spoiler issues. Talking about it in any detail feels akin to handing you a gift-wrapped present and saying, "I hope you like it -- It's a thriller about a diabolical secret experiment."

The joyful confection is coated in a sparkly gloss, bright enough to gleam from the darkest, most cynical corners.