Quest for the Egg Salad
Quest for the Egg Salad
| 15 March 2002 (USA)
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Even the Fugliest person can change the course of History.

Reviews
Hellen

I like the storyline of this show,it attract me so much

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Flyerplesys

Perfectly adorable

Platicsco

Good story, Not enough for a whole film

Fairaher

The film makes a home in your brain and the only cure is to see it again.

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mindsclay

I can't say it's the "worst" movie ever. Look at the last three installments of Star Wars. :) I enjoy watching nano-budget movies, but this one, albeit set in the guise of humor, was a bit.. uh.. dis-tasteful at times. Especially the intro. Could have done without that bit!There were some funny bits that I enjoyed. Specifically the Goblin King's last speech before dispatching his wraith. That was funny. Probably brought on by the technical difficulty of his having a mortal hand. Actually, if that type of writing was throughout the movie, it would have been closer to awesome.There seemed to me a bit too much homosexual references for such a band of brave adventurers. Teenape seemed to be the only one willing to partake of the elven chick. What's up with that? There were some references to other fantasy movies, but more tongue-in-cheek than relevant, as they were portrayed. Some bits worked...Actually, some of the make-up was okay for a nano-budget movie. Locations and sets, okay. But the story and dialog was rather missing.As I said before, I enjoy watching movies like this, because someone at least tried to make a movie. This movie "was" entertaining. And it did have some cohesion in the editing. But the script really needed some work. The actors weren't all that bad. Some actually pulled it off, but the rest sucked. Sorry.I noticed that this movie got more reviews than mine. Then again, most of this movie's reviews are how bad it sucked. I should be grateful for such reviews not being said about my first movie. Well, I guess I have praised this movie to a point? :) Don't let the negativity keep you from making more movies. Just try to make them better. 'Nuff said...

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Josh Myers (myrothe)

This was the worst movie I've ever seen. The beginning was childish (and gross) and was totally unrelated to the film. The budget is beyond low. A guy in a 25 cent rubber monkey mask?, scenes shot in someones basement?I thought it might be good as a parody, but its not even smart enough to be that. Basiclly its a bunch of people (whos maturity stopped around age 12) trying to throw as many dick jokes as they can into a non existent plot.I mean this looks like a video a bunch of drunk teens made on a Friday night. I cant see enjoying a second of this unless you are seriously immature, and drunk. This is like a 3rd grade fart joke told over and over.Not even good enough to be enjoyed as a bad movie. Pathetic and shameful.

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Barbecue

The highlight of this film is in the first minutes, where Teen Ape, while getting head from a perky anonymous skank, accidentally ejaculates across the room into the mouth of our narrator, who then proceeds to dribble what looks like skim milk into said skank's eager mouth, in what has to be the worst attempt at faking a "snowballing" scene in film history. Unfortunately, the ape-groupie departs, and things go rapidly downhill from there. Some of Teen Ape's obnoxious crude sexual commentary would be funny, if it were not so badly mumbled and incoherent. There are a lot of in-jokes and winks, but nothing funnier than what you'd see in a high school annual. The juxtaposition of medieval dialog with pseudo-gangsta hip-hop slang falls flat, and the crass dialog is too tediously delivered to be funny. One of the great things about truly dreadful movies is that the actors, while dreadful, are somewhat sincere. This cast doesn't suffer from such a misconception however. With a few exceptions, they know they suck, and don't seem to care. The result is more boredom than exploitation. Bright spots: Anonymous Slattern, Elegant Elliott, the Elf Ho', and the Wandering Swordsman.Funniest line: "...and my f**king hand turned mortal!"The Goblin KingIf you're a fan of low-life cinema a la Troma Team, and you expect something similar from this, you'll be disappointed. It's terrible, but not so terrible that it's fun to watch. A good movie to recommend to someone you're mad at.

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BHorrorWriter

Good times and a good cast make this film a good watch. Chris Seaver turns his attention from Horror/Comedy to Fantasy/Comedy. "Quest" is a good film with solid acting from the likes of Jesse Green, Tim Ekkebus, Seaver himself and all included in the cast...With the exceptions of Elegant Elliott Offen...Scary!!Chris actually had me sit in on a Fan Commentary track to be released later this year by Tempe. I can't wait for the extras on the disc. This movie is funny, gross, silly, and a bloody good time. Filled to the brim will all the craziness one expects from LBP!8 out of 10

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