Absolutely the worst movie.

I cannot think of one single thing that I would change about this film. The acting is incomparable, the directing deft, and the writing poignantly brilliant.

It's entirely possible that sending the audience out feeling lousy was intentional

Although I seem to have had higher expectations than I thought, the movie is super entertaining.

The plot revolves around a wannabe local TV reporter of unknown age who mystically understands that a series of killings has taken place. "Mystically" because she's able to find a necklace (which looks like an earring) in a murky swimming hole. Her father, also of unknown age, is the local cop, annoyed at his daughter (who apparently doesn't source her stories) for reporting on the murders. Daddy is the worst cop in the world since every crime scene he comes across "doesn't show any signs of struggle" including the obvious strangulation marks on a victims neck. To call this movie inept is an understatement. It *is*, however, the perfect movie to do complex mathematical computations to since missing any of the plot points means absolutely nothing. From the start, it's not even clear what's going on, who's involved or where it takes place geographically. At heart, it shows a basic misunderstanding of the genre and naive America worship. For some reason, people wind up "going to LA" a lot. Had this movie been acted in its native German, there'd be nothing to say except that the movie sucks and never, ever, ever watch it. HOWEVER - since the filmmakers' pretensions got the best of them, they did the whole thing in German version of Engrish. And that's what you should watch this. The gaffes and poor grasp of English idioms or even basic grammar kick this up to the level of "must watch". Don't get me wrong. It's still a two star movie but the script rockets into the stratosphere of surrealism because of it. Some of my faves:Sabrina: (reporting on one of the crimes) More evidence has been found about yesterday's evening Sabrina's cop-dad busting into a room to bust a perp: Here is the police! Hands up! Sabrina's cop-dad advising Sabrina to be safe: Lock the door. Don't let anybody into it Sabrina returning a dis: Stop acting like Miss Discounting Universe Sabrina to her dad who, tells her he's too busy to hear about an actually important lead: I will mail you the number via SMS Sabrina who's father has put her under house arrest for being better at his job than him and put a guard on her. She orders out for pitza (pizza): Mushrooms and tuna pitza! My favorite!Almost every single line contains a poorly pronounced word or some travesty of English and you are a Miss Discounting Universe if you don't watch this.

I have a feeling that this film was made with some European Union dosh. There is something about the EU on the end credits, but I wasn't concentrating too carefully at that point.But this film is worth catching if only for the truly bizarre experience of a group of native-German speakers declaiming the entire film in heavily-accented English which appears to have been learnt phonetically, so devoid is the delivery of any connection with the meaning of what's being said.One star because that's the lowest allowed, plus another for sheer unintentional hilarity, and a third for boobage.

This is a totally pointless movie, it's not scary or funny or anything in between, the direction and the script (if any!) are lousy and the acting is SO bad that it curls your toes just watching it. The origin of this movie seems to be Austrian, but everyone drives around in Swiss cars and the scenery is very much Heidi-in-the-Alps. If they didn't use cell-phones you would swear it was shot in the sixties or seventies, it all looks so extremely out-dated. Why on earth they let these local actors talk English, is beyond me, it makes everyone sound like they're playing in Allo, Allo, with heavy German accents but sadly enough without the humor and the fun. In the credits most actors have English sounding names, I can't believe that these are real, but then again, who would want to see his REAL name stated on this sad product.The plot is chaotic, the goings-on are bizarre and totally improbable and the killings are staged completely over the top, I mean, I like a good graphic kill but it should at least look a BIT realistic! The makers thought that some t*ts & ass were required in a wannabe cheap horror-flick, but apart from the use of several skimpy bikini's they surprisingly enough threw in more male than female nudity, which all the more proves the European origin of this project. All-in-all this movie maybe can serve for freshmen on a movie-academy as an example of all the faults and traps that any beginning director should avoid. As an attempt for serious entertainment it fails miserably.

In my lifetime I have seen thousands upon thousands of movies dating back to the pre 1910 biograph days up to the most recent 5.1 cinematic blockbusters. I've seen classic movies that turned out to be stinkers, and stinkers that turned out to be classics. So, with this said, I can say with confidence that I have NEVER EVER seen a film as bad as Silent Bloodnight. In fact, I think I'll go a bit further and go on record by saying that it is probably the worst movie ever made.Silent Bloodnight tries to be your run of the mill teen slasher flick but manages to fall short on so many levels. It's an Austrian film for starters, with Austrian 'actors', (for want of a better expression), who speak in a kind of pidgin English that makes Manuel from Fawlty Tower's sound like Olivier in comparison. This gives the movie an un-intentional comic feel and we get some hilarious lines about 'A Wicious Killer on ze loose' and 'Vhere voz ze wictim found?'.The plot is absolutely ridiculous and the whole movie has obviously been filmed on a 'Just got my Giro' kind of budget. The acting is just arse-clenchingly painful to watch. The main character, Sabrina, is determined to route out the killer when her main objective should be improving her English skills, and dare I say this, she has a seemingly inappropriate relationship with her Police Chief Father who, regardless of the time of day, always wears his uniform with his beret firmly tucked into his epulet straps.The movies ONLY redeeming quality is that the girls are quite hot and spend most of the movie clad in nothing more than figure hugging Bikini's displaying their ample cleavage, and for those that expect it, there is a little bit of nudity thrown in. However, even this does not save this movie from going down the gurgler as cheap titillation can only carry a movie so far.At the end of my reviews, I usually end with the word 'enjoy!'. On this occasion I won't bother as I stand by judgement that there has never been, and probably never will be, a film as bad as Silent Bloodnight and that's definitely a good thing. BEWARE!!!, Avoid this one like bird flu.