Let's be realistic.

Watch something else. There are very few redeeming qualities to this film.

I think this is a new genre that they're all sort of working their way through it and haven't got all the kinks worked out yet but it's a genre that works for me.

There is, somehow, an interesting story here, as well as some good acting. There are also some good scenes

The Boneyard (1991) * 1/2 (out of 4)A couple cops and a psychic investigate the murder of three children. Their investigation leads them to the coroner's office where they quickly learn that the children are in fact zombies and soon everyone is trapped inside the building with them.THE BONEYARD is your typcial low-budget horror film from the 90s that really doesn't have much originality to it and in fact it really doesn't have too much good about it. You've got a couple former stars thrown into the cast, some decent special effects but there's no question that a lot of the running time doesn't have too much going on.I say that because the first forty-two minutes of the movie has the two detectives and the psychic doing nothing but talking. At first I was wondering if I was watching another movie because for a horror movie there's certainly nothing going on for the longest time. Once the zombie children show up things do pick up a bit and one can't help but wonder why they waited so long. Everyone knows that "something" needs to happen every ten-minutes so making us wait over forty was just a major mistake.The zombie children actually look very good and for the most part the special effects were better than I expected and that's especially true for a couple "large" creatures that show up towards the end. The performances are pretty much what you would expect as they range from decent to poor. Norman Fell and Phyllis Diller are on hand and Ed Nelson was also good in the lead.THE BONEYARD should have and could have been much better but it gets off to such a slow and bad start that the film never fully recovers.

Two detectives and a psychic investigating a series of murders visit a morgue at night - known as The Boneyard - only to become embroiled in a fight for their lives as the dead return to life... Having previously seen the trailer I assumed this straight to video movie to be a comedy but surprisingly much of it is played straight, and there are some pretty genuine scares, in particular when three dead children rise from the dead. However, the appearance of a giant zombie poodle in the last quarter certainly throws it towards humour. Acting is generally reasonable, as are the effects though the zombie poodle and it's owner, Miss Poopinplatz, are deliberately OTT & goofy. My two problems with this film are firstly that it takes a while to get going & is too long. And secondly it starts straight but descends into farce, I just found that it was not particularly handled well. Overall a reasonably entertaining b-movie, best accompanied with alcohol!

what starts as your average b-movie zombie flick mutates into something so funny, i laughed until i almost wet myself! Phyllis diller's performance is wonderfully crotchety and, in truth, the only one that sticks in the mind. i watched this film with friends in one of our monthly "fright-night" gatherings. we hadn't rented it, it was on t.v. it was my decision to watch it rather than another film we had rented. i'm so glad we did! i would never admit it to my friends, but the zombie children were really creepy (children of the corn, eat your hearts out) and had me checking under the bed for the first time since i was 8. of course, if you've seen this film, you already know who, or rather, what steals the show. if you haven't seen it before, stick with it to the end, you're in for a rare treat. dog lovers beware! after this, walkies will take on a whole new meaning!

This movie cracked me up,for ten minuites it seems like a "straight" horror,then wham!!!! really really stupid stuff,like green puke and cool gore.I loved phylis diller in this,its her best role ever.The poodle was very cool too.Do not take this movie seriously,this is for fans of "the living dead" type.