The Worst Film Ever

Simply Perfect

This is one of the few movies I've ever seen where the whole audience broke into spontaneous, loud applause a third of the way in.

what a terribly boring film. I'm sorry but this is absolutely not deserving of best picture and will be forgotten quickly. Entertaining and engaging cinema? No. Nothing performances with flat faces and mistaking silence for subtlety.

It says much for the skill of director Phil Rosen that we are actually able to follow this film's corkscrew narrative quite well, despite its trick opening (which is solely designed to form an excuse for the title), extremely complicated plot and multiple impersonations. Many of the players – in fact more than half the principal cast – are not what they seem. And this applies to small-time players as well as the stars. So credit must also of course go to the cast, particularly heroine Dorothy Tree, plus "Duchess" Mary Doran, Paul Fix as the innocent guy that hero Onslow Stevens has railroaded into prison, Lafe McKee as a sympathetic heavy, John Kelly as the cabbie thug, Robert Homans as the homicide captain who deserts his post to aid the reluctant hero, and Onslow Stevens as the dumb bunny hero himself. About the only members of the cast who not leading double lives are dull, no-brains Stevens and defense attorney Selmer Jackson. Directed with a sure hand by Phil Rosen, Bridge of Sighs (sic) is available on very good Alpha DVD.

Question marks and inconsistencies abound in this cheap programmer from Invincible Pictures, the kind that always make me wonder why the film makers even bothered. The biggest head scratcher here is how Marion Courtney (Dorothy Tree) got to be an inmate at Women's State Prison - how did that happen? And did anyone else wonder why all the other female prisoners were such good lookers? Chatting and laughing it up with each other like they had no care in the world. None of it rang true, nor did the original crime that put Harry West (Paul Fix) behind bars for the murder that began the picture. The murder weapon winds up in the pocketbook of Duchess Evelyn (Mary Doran), and she's not even considered a suspect? OK, she winds up convicted as an accessory after the fact, but this was all just so sloppy that it defies credibility.It's only when the picture was over that I was able to put two and two together with Paul Fix portraying Harry West. He looked completely unrecognizable to those of us who knew him better as Sheriff Micah Torrance in the Chuck Connors 'Rifleman' TV series. Fix popped up in a lot of these old programmers from back in the day, but for me, he'll always be remembered best for his work in TV and movie Westerns. The revelation in this picture that he was Marion's brother seemed to come out of left field at the finale, serving no purpose other than to create some tension in the Courteney/Powell romance.

With a novel beginning - a girl Marion (Dorothy Tree) is being mercilessly cross examined in the witness box. The deputy District Attorney ((Onslow Stevens) then asks her out to dinner - they have been fooling around in an empty court.Mary has a few secrets. When her brother Harry (Paul Fix)is arrested for a night club murder she decides to hire hot shot lawyer Alan Adams. When Harry refuses to tell the truth about himself he is convicted and sent to prison. I don't know how but next thing Marion's aunt and uncle get a cryptic wire from her. She is also going to prison as an accessory - she wants to find out all she can about the Duchess, the girl she is convinced is the real killer. Mary Doran, who had a memorable career - she played the fiery chorus girl in "The Broadway Melody", the other woman in "The Divorcée" and in occasional Jean Harlow films - usually inmates!!! - she plays Duchess.An escape is planned for Duchess and when it happens Marion (or "Mary") goes with her . The Duchess's boyfriend, Arnie (Walter Byron) orchestrated the break and instantly takes a shine to Mary. The police find their hide-out and set up a wire so they can hear their plans - but Arnie cuts the wire. While there Mary sees people that gave false evidence in court. Among them, an elderly man seems to be intimidated by Arnie but Marion convinces him to do the right thing for the sake of his son. Before they can get away Arnie arrives and knocks the old man down - he does not come into it again - what happened to him!!!! There is a car chase and of course Harry is exonerated of the crime.It is okay. Again the big plus is seeing stars on their way up or down.

This film is missing something. It's a sense of order. When it's all over, the whole thing is very confusing. There are so many plot holes and convenient events that it just doesn't work. What was that crime exactly and why did the guy get nailed so badly? And how could that girl be thinking so fast as to keep the gun? And why did she end up in a prison with rooms that looked like the YMCA with weapons all around? And why wouldn't she tell? It's so full of things that just wouldn't happen if a man's life was at stake. Then there are the criminals who set things up and the double cross. It's a veritable mess of events that just don't wash, even in the world of the low budget crime movie. The actors also look like they are a bit bored and have nothing to work with.