The greatest movie ever made..!

Let's be realistic.

Excellent, Without a doubt!!

The movie really just wants to entertain people.

There's something rotten in the South Pacific, and it ain't Bloody Mary's teeth. One of the truly laughable movies of the 1950's yet not worth a cult following, this is truly a stinker. Man-hating women imprison fighters in World War II stranded on Druid Island, lost from.civilization for millennium yet complete with modern hairstyles and an uncanny ability to reproduce more women without a man around, at least one that lived to tell about it. Stock footage from One Million Years B.C. adds pre-historic creatures that are obviously enlarged mammals you'd see on a zoo, skewed to look creepy. These creatures give better performances than any of the human actors who were obviously reading cue cards. Actually, the male actors are reading the lines more realistically while the females are very one note in how they recite their lines. The explanation of how the women decide to free the men is pretty lame, although the leader of the Druids seems to know the dangers they might face. When one of the men is attacked by a supposed flesh eating plant, it actually appears to be two newspapers smacked over his face to emulate the obviously phony monster.The giant Jaramillo monster is perhaps the silliest looking of the critters, while what is supposed to be a dinosaur like critter is nothing more than a harmless gecko. The camera on the newly filmed footage moves at odd speeds at times, giving an impression of intended fast action. Stock footage of the volcano exploding is great, but I wanted to yell at the stupid characters, If the falling rocks don't get you, the lava will! Also laughable are "The hairy men" who look like residents of Dogpatch more than cavemen.If the film makes any point, it is the message that any female rib society will instantly collapse when men appear out of nowhere because no matter what their feminist leaders say, the others will ultimately be controlled by their hormones.

Untamed Women (1952) ** (out of 4) Officer Steve Holloway (Mikel Conrad) is picked up by the government adrift in a raft. He's been missing for many months and can't remember anything so a doctor (Lyle Talbot) gives him a serum that will bring his memory back and force him to tell the truth. Steven then tells the story of himself and three friends whose plane was forced down and they ended up in a raft and landed on an island. The island is ran by a group of women who date back to the Druids and they also have dinosaurs, an erupting volcano and a group of "Hairy Men" they must battle. Hal Roach must have made a killing selling off dinosaur footage from his 1940 film ONE MILLION B.C. because it has been featured in countless poverty row flicks including this one here. UNTAMED WOMEN has the reputation of being one of the worst movies ever made. There's no question that it's a very badly made movie but thankfully it's hammy enough to where you should be entertained (if you enjoy bad movies). There are some pretty memorable bad moments but the highlight of the entire film has to be the scene where one of men, suffering from issues with his mother, walks off into a forest where he gets attacked by a flesh-eating plant. His three buddies come to the rescue and just seeing how this scene plays out had me laughing out loud. Another funny sequence happens once the men are in the ocean on their raft. It's raining as hard as you can imagine yet the men's hair and clothes aren't even wet. I guess we can all give Michael Caine and JAWS: THE REVENGE a break now because the sequence here is even more pathetic. The performances are all pretty bland but the four male actors are at least entertaining enough and help draw you into the movie. The female performers were clearly hired for their looks and clearly not their acting ability. The dinosaur footage is all rather campy and there's some footage from a couple others movies but I couldn't identify which ones. Some of it might have been new because there's some stuff dealing with what looks like a large porcupine. The volcano footage at the end is yet more stock footage but at least it looks somewhat good. At 70-minutes we can be thankful that the film doesn't run too long as that's just about the right amount of time for a flick like this. Cult favorite Lyle Talbot appears in a few minutes worth a footage and he's always nice to see. UNTAMED WOMEN certainly isn't for those looking for art films but if you like cheap, generic genre movies then it's certainly got enough bad moments to be entertaining.

Untamed Women has pilot Mikel Conrad who has spent time on a rubber raft being rescued and is now in the hospital. He and his crew have crashed in the Pacific (I think because the film isn't real specific) laying in the bed totally mute and in shock. Dr. Lyle Talbot administers some sodium pentathol and Conrad like Ishmael tells his tale.After sinking an enemy cruiser, the bomber is hit with flak and has to ditch in the ocean. The crew bails out and eventually four of them reach an uncharted island that the mapmakers missed.The uncharted island was really losing currency at this time. There just aren't any of those in the Atlantic and in the Pacific during World War II, the Americans and the Japanese probably charted everything that was left, but I digress.Once on the island Conrad and his crew run into all kinds of things, a tribe of Neanderthals who need some women because these guys definitely haven't had their itches scratched in like forever, a tribe of Amazons who are descended from Druids scattered to the four winds after the invasion of Britain by the Romans, a volcano everybody worships and for good measure some prehistoric beasts thrown in courtesy of One Million BC. I think you can figure out the rest of the plot with these elements.The movie leaves this location purposely vague. At one point the usual guy from Brooklyn who pops up in all war movies says that if they get back on the ocean the enemy might pick them up and they'll spend the rest of the war in a concentration camp eating raw fish and rice. Clues that these guys could be in either theater.These Amazons are without men because the Neanderthals have killed them all off in previous raids. They like what they see in this stranded bomber crew who speak so foreign, but want to make sure they're not with the Neanderthals. As for their looks, in those animal skins with Fifties styled hairdos, they look like a line that any Las Vegas club would be proud to have.Untamed Women just goes to show that Ed Wood did not direct all the bad movies from this era.

You would be hard-pressed to come up with a movie dumber and duller than "Untamed Women". It clocks in at barely more than an hour, and a significant chunk of it is simply padding with stock footage; but in spite of its sensational premise (four WWII Air Force crewmen are stranded on a deserted tropical isle with a tribe of mateless women), it drags on endlessly and never manages to generate even the slightest bit of interest or credibility. The "Untamed Women" have modern 50s suburban hairstyles and makeup, are plain and uncharismatic (they can't "act" at all, of course), have no muscle tone, are forced to mouth an unconvincing and unintentionally hilarious mix of Elizabethan English and pseudo-Shakespeare, and generally generate less erotic interest than the JC Penny lingerie catalog. The worst of the lot (because she is on camera more than the rest) is high priestess "Sandra", who couldn't read a line believably at gun point and couldn't "die" convincingly on camera if you actually shot her. (Not that I am suggesting anyone should. Bad performances are not a capital crime.) The men aren't much better, although some of the fault lies in the ham-handed clichés of the screenplay. Quite early in the movie I began to hope that the comic relief guy (from "Brooklyn", of course) would fall into a volcano as soon as possible. His role (and performance) was even worse than Sid Melton's similar role in "Lost Continent.") I didn't think that was possible, but the actor,director, and screenplay managed to top Sid in almost every way. Um, does this call for a "Bravo" or a Bronx cheer? Also memorably awful were the, um, "battle" sequences where the heroes battled the "Hairy Men", i.e. shot them. The Hairy Men are notable for their complete lack of energy or interest in the proceedings; they fight as though their limbs are made of wet noodles,and when they get "shot", they fall down as if struck by narcolepsy. One other sign of a really shoddy budget screenplay is the way the movie ends; the whole tribe of women perishes "off camera" as the movie shows stock footage of a rock slide and a volcano eruption.So do their tormentors, the "Hairy Men". It's pretty obvious that the director either lost interest or ran out of money and just decided to pretend he'd resolved the plot with a deus-ex-machina ending that wasn't justified by anything that had come before. Lyle Talbot is in here in a small part in the scenes that bookend the movie,and he gives his usual sturdy, dependable performance. It only makes the rest of the movie worse by comparison.