Surprisingly incoherent and boring

Excellent and certainly provocative... If nothing else, the film is a real conversation starter.

It’s sentimental, ridiculously long and only occasionally funny

This movie feels like it was made purely to piss off people who want good shows

Pretty disappointing B movie. The story is daft (a kid turns feral after a camping trip in the woods where his dad dies and he is left to fend for himself. Years later, he somehow coaxes children of the near-by town into living with him in the woods and attacking all adults. None of this is explained apart from an extremely tenuous idea that he turned murderous because no one came to help him and his dad - no search party? How he brainwashes all the other kids is not even mentioned).All in all, a real slow mover with nonsensical script, character actions, plot etc. Terrible acting too.However, the last 5 minutes are crazy, when a bunch of adults from the town come and slaughter all the wayward kids that have been living in the woods (this includes their own children). It is nonsensical madness but even more than that, I was *slightly* disturbed by the rather perversely graphic killings of the kids in what was a sudden and jarring change of pace and atmosphere. I was particularly surprised at the guy who holds a kid by the hair, puts a gun into his mouth and blows the back of his head out. I don't know why I felt slightly disturbed but I did. Still, the fact that it suddenly became weird, fast paced, gory and a tad more interesting earned it one more star than I would otherwise have given.

It does resemble "The Children (1980)" somehow and is also from Troma. Here there is actually a story behind the children's actions. I was surprised that the movie is from the late eighties as it looked so seventies to me. Character development is still not much to shout about. The killings done by the kids are a bit more inventive. Unfortunately they also kill of good characters. I would have given it a 4 but the ending was so stupid and only went for shock value than actually opt for a proper solution. For those who want to know: The adults kill all the kids in the end because they believe the blabber of some religious moron in a rather graphic way even though they are no longer under control of their devilish leader.

"Beware:Children at Play" tells the shocking story of small town in New Jersey called Pine Barrens.Every month one child is missing from it and some adults are mysteriously butchered and cannibalized.It's up to Sheriff Carr and paperback writer John DeWolfe to solve the mystery...Mik Cribben's "Beware:Children at Play" is an amateurish and surprisingly nasty "Children of the Corn" knock-off.The acting is poor and the gore effects are gleefully cheap for example a salesman gets sliced clean in half but still attempts to crawl away with his entrails hanging out.The chanting of murderous children is pretty creepy.The final showdown is an insane and bloody massacre of children which is poorly executed at the same time.6 dead children out of 10.

I have yet to see the big-budget Beowulf movie from a couple years ago. Probably never will. I don't care for big-budget movies, I like 'em old and obscure, and sometimes, downright awful. Despite all that, I got a strong feeling Beowulf is probably a decent watch compared to this one. And whatever vague connection these two movies share, really makes no difference to me, because big-budget cinema ain't my cup of tea, and Beware: Children At Play clearly ain't worth a damn.Yay, it's a camping movie from the 80's. Father and son, playing, and frolicking amongst nature. Awkward little scenes involving the father quoting Beowulf, and father and son singing "Old McDonald". Father chases son a tad too much, and gets his leg stuck in a bear trap. Son sits by dying fathers side for days, listening to him go insane, and obsessively quoting Beowulf, and eating beans. A lot of talk about cannibalism. Father croaks, brain-washed son ditches beans, and mutilates and eats freshly deceased father. Wait a minute, this isn't a camping movie, this is an extremely low-budget, not-so-well-thought-out, non-Kaufman, Troma movie... from the 80's.Fast forward 10 years. John Dewolfe, along with his irritating little family is driving out to rural New Jersey to help out his old army buddy (sherriff of Rural, New Jersey) and his irritating little family, who are all stressed because his daughter was kidnapped. Actually, a lot of kids from this irritating little town have turned up missing. Is it foul play, or did they simply take off because they were sick of being bored? Well, whatever the case, sci-fi writer, John Dewolfe, Army-buddy-Sheriff, his pal, Dr. Fish, and some psychic should have enough brain power between them to get to the bottom of this.After the first few scenes involving father and son time, my expectations were already low enough. I had come to terms with exactly how bad of an experience this was going to be. Which, if my naive assumption had been accurate, this movie wouldn't have been all that bad. Enter John Dewolfe and family, and everything goes to Hell. Beware: Children At Play is just plain boring, and there's no way around it. Not the worst I've ever seen, not even remotely the worst from Troma, but this just gives you no reason to welcome it into your collection. For far more worthwhile non-Kaufman Troma's, check out Decampitated (an actual camping movie), or Redneck Zombies (masterpiece), or Combat Shock (most depressing comedy ever made). Sure, Beware Children At Play does offer head-ache inducing boredom, an unappealing, cheap, keyboard score, zero intentional or unintentional humor, and, pretty much, nothing else, but if you actually make it through this entire movie, you just might look back on your experience in Rural New, Jersey with fond memories. 3/10