The Worst Film Ever

just watch it!

The film makes a home in your brain and the only cure is to see it again.

I think this is a new genre that they're all sort of working their way through it and haven't got all the kinks worked out yet but it's a genre that works for me.

One of a series of obscure 80's features released by Team Troma, Blades is a spoof of Jaws with a killer lawnmower(!)replacing the shark, invading a country club golf course, Tall Grass, during tournament time as a Pro Am Invitational is on the horizon. Troubled, melancholy, alcoholic former circuit star, Roy Kent(Robert North), whose career had taken a turn for the worse, is hired by club owner, Norman Osgood(William Towner)whose wife, Bea(Holly Stevenson)talked him into it..mainly because Bea lustfully desires Roy. Roy's hiring truly angers Kelly Lange(Victoria Scott)because she covets the position of Golf Pro and has worked her way up to earn such a role. Working as his assistant, there's immediate friction. Meanwhile, the killer lawnmower is catching victims off guard, leaving their bloody clothes and remains. Norman, of course, wishes for the murders to remain hush hush due to the tournament(..IT'S ON TV!!)and confides in local inept sheriff, Charlie Kimmel(Charlie Quinn)to find the killer, which includes a manhunt involving a mob of locals. Roy is alarmed at his employer's demands for the tourney to continue despite the fact that innocent lives may be in danger. Wandering around the golf course and nearby wilderness, former grounds-keeper, Deke Slade(Jeremy Whelan)knows the identity of the killer, but is considered a lunatic and sent to prison as the one responsible after being caught by hunters in possession of a regular lawnmower. Roy, not persuaded that Deke's the man, convinces Kelly to assist him in catching the killer, who attacks a pro golfer, Squire Evans(Lee Devin)during the tournament, thanks to their boss's decision not to cancel the prestigious event. Joining forces with "Great White Hunter" Deke, after his release, Roy and Kelly will attempt to put an end to this fiend once and for all.The lawnmower is often shot through point-of-view, burrowing through grass in pursuit of it's next victim. Until the attack on Squire, the film remained bloodless, just showing the sparse remains of victims after the lawnmower attacked them out of the range of the camera(..often victims were attacked in the woods with only their screams and shaky bush providing us with an indication of murderous activity. The two goriest murders show victims being pulled into the grinding blades of the machine, their legs being sawed into, as the lawnmower drags their carcass away with them shrieking in terror. There are moments where the film lets go of itself, but director Thomas R. Rondinella really gives the film a rather sedate presentation despite the ludicrous premise. One wonders aloud what must be going through these characters' minds in that they are doing battle with an enraged lawnmower, and the serious tone really boggles the mind..perhaps to show these characters unwavering resolve in the face of crisis regarding a lawnmower, the intention was to get giggles by playing the material mostly straight, despite the absurdity of it all. This film doesn't really feature the kind of madness and excess Troma is known for, despite a premise that reads like it would be. The scenes where Derek and Roy are shooting loaded rifles and shotguns at this lawnmower that seems indestructible is simply surreal. I mean there are outrageous moments such as the lawnmower causing a riot on camera as people run for their lives, and the mob preparing to catch the killer on a golf course(..and, in particular, the final showdown with the machine), but, more often than not, even these scenes have a bit of restraint not typical with the usual popular output released by Troma. Could gain a cult following if more discover it, but I'm guessing a majority of Troma fans will find it disappointing.

Starting of, the sound was already below zero. I think I must had a bad copy or something. Basically there isn't anything scary in this one, almost no blood, no gore , no nudity, just boredom. The acting is extreme low and the script, well, it's a kind of rip off of Jaws and when the thing, won't spoil it, starts moving it does remind me of the evil spirits in Evil Dead. It's a lot of blah blah, don't know why people are giving this one 5 or more. Okay, it's a Troma release so it's cheesy but they have better things out. One of the turkeys I fast forwarded while watching, and I can tell you, I have seen already more then a thousand flicks. I gave it a two just because the score is okay. Got damn, what a waist of time, happy I just spoiled 1 euro on it.

Troma released this not so great Jaws parody. It seems people are being found murdered on a golf course. Fingers point to the creepy greens keeper, but it becomes obvious that a maniacal lawnmower is responsible. This movie has a good setting, and a pretty descent last quarter, but everything else is rather bland. The characters are pretty stiff and lifeless. The guy who plays the hot-shot alcoholic pro-golfer looks like he would rather be elsewhere. Everyone else sleepwalks through their roles, minus the greens keeper, who steals the show in the last bit. I usually don't mind poor acting, but this movie seems to rely on boring conversations with the characters. The killer lawnmower doesn't even make an appearance until the end. The jokes that poke fun at Jaws are usually pretty dumb. One scene has the hero cutting open a clipping bag, looking for body parts, and a Playboy falls out. Ha. Could have been better. Should of had more crazy lawnmower horror scenes, and less talking. The last 20 minutes are not that bad, though. One And A Half Stars.

The summary makes sense to those of you who have seen the movie, I'm sure.To start with, understand that this is a bad movie. On the other hand, however, it is sort of an interesting concept and is quite humorous at points. I'd say that the idea is poorly carried out, but there's not really a good way to carry out a killer lawnmower movie. It is rather entertaining, but don't rent this if you're looking for a masterpiece.Could make for a good evening if you enjoy laughing at bad horror movies, as you probably do if you're even looking at this.