Touches You

It’s not bad or unwatchable but despite the amplitude of the spectacle, the end result is underwhelming.

The tone of this movie is interesting -- the stakes are both dramatic and high, but it's balanced with a lot of fun, tongue and cheek dialogue.

Through painfully honest and emotional moments, the movie becomes irresistibly relatable

Tony Quinn croaks and wants to come back to life, but he's having a little trouble being reincarnated in the Maldive Islands when he tries to possess a younger man's body so he can 'do it' again with his wife Bo Derek.Director John Derek's last movie is a lesson in experimental film-making, especially on the subject of story continuity. Bo rides trains, cars, motor-bikes, airplanes, and elephants, and she still never really seems to get very far. Still, I like John's 'direction' - it's so innovative (read: bizarre), and Bo has never looked more gorgeous.Mostly for Bo Derek aficionados, unless you're interested in seeing Tony as a blurry ghost or Bo wearing an entire black bear-hide as an overcoat, a toilet-paper roll cover as a ski cap, or the entire skin of a dead fox - head and all - as a winter hat.I always have two opinions about a film.... my critical opinion and my personal opinion. 'Critically', this flick sucks. 'Personally' for me, this is my fave movie of all-time ;)

"Ghost" did this kind of story better.Of course, comparing "Ghost" to "Ghosts Can't Do It" is like comparing a banquet line to a compost heap.As much as I like a good Bo Derek nude scene (for all the umpteen times I've seen them), here they're all just so... and I can't believe I'm saying this... BORING.Yes, you heard me.She gets naked, yes. She dances seductively in what John Derek must have thought was a clever variation on the same type of dance scene in "Flashdance". She strips down to nothing on the beach. Dips down into a hot tub, sans clothes. And blah blah blah....But she just stands there. Yes, she stood there in her other movies, too. But it was the WAY she stood there that got to you, if you know what I mean, guys. Yeah, sure you do.And let's not even get into what Anthony Quinn, Julie Newmar and Donald Trump are doing in a movie where everyone is more interested in seeing how Bo is going to get naked in the next scene.Oh, I'm sure John had his own ideas of making Bo the next Helen Hayes (snicker, snicker...), save for one big difference: BO CAN NOT ACT. Nudity. Standing around with her mouth partially open. If that were all acting were, then yes, Bo would already be the next Helen Hayes.But here in the real world....One star. Even I was bored by this one, and that's not easy to do with me. I'd give this one no stars but darn it, Bo, when you look at me with your mouth partially open....

With a Bo Derek movie, the audience get just what they expect. A paper thin plot and a few shots of Mrs. Derek in no clothes. 'Ghosts can't do it' is just that. The first fifteen minutes is ordinary TV drama, as long as Scott [Anthony Quinn] is still alive. He is a very good actor with long experience in a lot of different roles, but it seems as even a famous actor need to work just for money sometimes. Bo Derek is the opposite, always playing a strikingly handsome young woman with or without clothes. The movie is a complete waste of time. If you want to see Quinn, rent Lawrence of Arabia or La Strada. If you want to see nude women or bad acting, rent any porno movie.

The Derek's have over the 1980s produced a few decent bids to acquire the title "worst movie of all time", and this is probably their prime achievement in these stakes. In fact, this film can be regarded as belonging to the "so bad, it's good" category, right up there with the products of the likes of Edward Wood Jr. or Doris Wishman. This explains the IMDb voting pattern for this film with some people handing out top marks.Anthony Quinn made the odd dodgy film in his time, but this performance as a randy ghost is so incredibly bad, it has to be seen to be believed.