Very Cool!!!

SERIOUSLY. This is what the crap Hollywood still puts out?

Fantastic!

Disappointment for a huge fan!

I have been a KISS fan since I was a little tyke, and back when this stinkburger came out on TV, I had to watch it. I only now realize that the world of music-related films must be pock-marked with bomb craters (no pun intended)left in the wake of such cinema gold as this poor excuse to sell cheaply-made action figures by MEGO. I mean, even Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band (1978) makes sense compared to this.It was a cartoon. A live-action cartoon. Joseph Barbera must have felt horrible after unleashing this poor excuse for a film on an unwitting public.But yet, as with so many other films that are real cheese-fests, I can't help but sit mesmerized by the events on screen. I'm not following the apparent lack of plot, nor am I really caring about the equally detestable special defects, I guess it's that I just go into Zombie mode with this film. If Dr. Forrester of MST3k really wanted to rule the world so bad, he would have used THIS film to turn Joel & the 'bots into so much mental cabbage.I am still a fan of KISS, however. This film failed to change that. All the same, I am NOT a fan of the people responsible for convincing Gene, Paul, Ace, and Peter that a TV movie of the week would be a great idea for publicity.I think that any film aficionado worth his/her salt owes it to themselves to see this film once. after that, appropriate dosage should be determined by your physician.

KISS Meets the Phantom of the Park is set at the Magic Mountain Amusement Park which is gearing up to hold a series of KISS concerts in a hope to generate some much needed cash. Park manager Calvin Richards (Carmine Caridi) fires the park's creator & brilliant scientist Abner Devereaux (Anthony Zerbe) who is not very happy about it, as revenge he takes control of his assistant Sam (Terry Lester) in order to put a devious plan into action. Devereaux plans to make exact robotic replicas of the members of KISS & substitute them for the real thing & using their popularity & altered on stage lyrics intends to incite a riot which will destroy the park & leave him all satisfied & happy. However KISS aren't any ordinary rock band & are in fact superheroes who decide to fight Devereaux & stop is evil plan.Originally made for telly by the Hanna-Barbara Production company (yes the same one responsible for all those cartoons) & loosely based on the Marvel comic books which had KISS as an ordinary rock band by day & superheroes by night this is one of the most amazingly bad films I have ever seen, it's the type of film where mere words alone cannot do it justice & you just have to have seen it to understand what everyone else is on about. First of all I should point out that KISS Meets the Phantom of the Park aired on US telly before being re-edited, re-scored, retitled to KISS Attack of the Phantom & getting a theatrical release throughout Europe & the two films have fairly significant differences. Many scenes present in the US version are not in the European one & vise-versa while the soundtrack is also very different with many more solo KISS songs in the European cut. I will be basing my comment on the European version & have not seen the US television cut. To be honest I don't quite know where to start to describe KISS Meets the Phantom of the Park, it's quite simply one of the most hilariously bad, over-the-top, unintentionally funny, camp, silly, childish & downright entertaining part horror, part action, part superhero, part comedy, part rock concert films I have ever seen. The script is terrible & has the most moronic plot ever, this scientist because he is being fired devises a horribly complicated & expensive plan to destroy a theme park but the rock band KISS who are really superheroes foil his plan. This has everything, a mad scientist, bad special effects, musical concert footage badly edited into the story, endless shots of random amusement park rides, a love interest subplot, the worst looking Frankenstein monster ever committed to film, the whole 70's hippy vibe & even some teenage thugs who have names like Slime, Chopper & Dirty Dee. How could any self respecting lover of horror, trash, cult, sci-fi & bad cinema in general not like KISS Meets the Phantom of the Park? It's absolute rubbish from start to finish but boy is it entertaining laugh out loud & cringe in embarrassment rubbish with an ending that makes zero sense.I must admit I know nothing about KISS as a band, until I saw this I don't think I had ever consciously listened to one of their teen orientated rock tracks in my life & I have to say that after seeing this I am most definitely not a fan. The concert footage might appeal to some but I thought it sucked & they just look ridiculous in those outfits & that clown inspired face-paint. When they aren't performing on stage they are superheroes & their special powers are lame, one shoots silly laser beams from his eyes, the other breathes fire & another can teleport wherever he likes & I'm not sure about the fourth member as he didn't really do anything that could be describes as superhero-ish. All of their voices have been electronically altered to presumably sound menacing but fail completely & they not only look ridiculous but sound it as well. The fight scenes are strictly for kids & look awful, they are badly choreographed & no-one ends up getting hurt. The opening titles are also a hoot as superimposed images of KISS play over shots of the amusement park at night.The film has a very bland flat & frankly dull look about it, it screams TV film. Apparently all four members of KISS hate the film & it's easy to see why as it makes them look like prize turkey's. According to the IMDb the bad were given their lines on set just before action was called & none of them even knew how the film would end which I suppose means there wasn't a script & to be honest it really does feel although this was made up as the makers went along. As I said I am not a fan of KISS, I mean judging by this they can neither sing nor act!KISS Meets the Phantom of the Park (wrong, there is no mysterious Phantom in this) is one of those guilty pleasure type films, it's absolutely awful in every way from start to finish but it's just so funny & ridiculous that I couldn't help but be entertained by it although if you have a low pain threshold you might want to give this a miss.

This is a 70's TV-movie in every sense of the word, with all the crazy music and odd film making.KISS are superheroes to the top degree, and of course KISS is Gene Simmons, Paul Stanley, Peter Criss and Ace Frehley. They all prove that they cannot act in the least, even though it sure is fun watching them try! But the movie really isn't quite as bad as so any think. It's actually filmed quite well with some decent editing (here and there) and the actors are obviously having a good time.KISS fan or not, everyone who likes anything a bit off the wall should check out this classic, and I do mean classic!

This is such a terrible movie that i can't help but love it. It's so pointless! The plot is terrible, it looks like it was shot on a broken VHS camera by someone with a blindfold on. The acting really couldn't be any worse but the music is good apart from when the evil Kiss robots do a show. Can anyone tell me why Beth is in there, yeah it's a good song but it's not set-up, no-one comments on it and everyone is just posing... absurdly. The thing i love the most though is how Gene strides around in his platforms, he looks like he's been riding a horse for too long! It's such fun it has to be watched and absolutely essential if your in danger of taking Kiss too seriously...These are the reasons why i hate this film and the reasons why i love it. Don't ask me how that works i'm as confused as you.