Nice effects though.

i know i wasted 90 mins of my life.

If the ambition is to provide two hours of instantly forgettable, popcorn-munching escapism, it succeeds.

One of the most extraordinary films you will see this year. Take that as you want.

It's Godfrey Ho ninja time once again...and while Ninja Kill is technically credited to Joseph Lai, the mark of Ho reigns supreme for all to witness and behold. In this particular pajama'd jaunt, Ninja Master Gordon (Harrison in his usual role in these things) takes it upon himself to stop some planned political assassinations in Thailand. Of course, said assassinations are done by ninjas, so ol' Gordy must, in his words, "Kill the ninja killers!" On the ninjas' hit list are a senator Lam from Thailand, plus two people named Springfield and Ryan. And as far as we can tell, that is not the name of an 80's sitcom. Helping out NMG is a special agent named David. While working undercover as a farmer for some reason (maybe it's just fun) David meets and falls for a girl named Rose. Romance aside, who is the real villain? Is it token White-guy ninja named Stuart (as all decent ninjas are), is it a man named Cuba, or could it be a mysterious mayoral candidate known only as "Miss Littleton"? If you're not puzzled enough already, check it out today! Ah, Godfrey Ho, where would the 80's Ninja Boom be without his tireless efforts? He was integral to the Ninja Boom, and for proof, look no further than the killer big box VHS from TransWorld Entertainment. How could you resist it? It's big, bold, brash, in your face, and extra ninja-y. Now imagine a whole shelf full of these bad boys. Oh yeah. If you're familiar with other Godfrey Ho movies, you'll recognize the cut-and-splice style, making plot and characters nigh-on impossible to decipher. One minute, an (interestingly mustache-less) Harrison is talking to an Oates lookalike named Pedro (of all things), then the next minute in the other plot (there's usually at least two: ninja and non-ninja. Whether or not they fit together is incidental) David is talking to his buddy Mickey, a superstitious guy who wears "spirit tags" and something called a Soul Vest. Of course, David didn't even want to take on the assignment in the first place, whining to NMG, "I don't even know where Thailand is!" Presumably he's from Hong Kong, even though women are named Miss Littleton, places are called things like Wakefield Alley, and, dubbing-wise, people speak a deafening and upsetting version of English.This one has more car chases and gun-shooting than a lot of its ninja brethren, but there's plenty of filler and it gets boring periodically. But on the bright side, there's the prerequisite Final Field Fight, sax on the soundtrack, and NMG wears a purple outfit this time and fights the baddies with cymbals. Cymbals. They always seem to give him one different ninja novelty per film, but there's been so many over the years. Now he's fighting off assailants with percussion. What's next, a cowbell? Hopefully.As they have done in the past, the Lai/Ho team (not to be confused with Alexi Laiho) outright steal Kraftwerk's Trans Europe Express and use it for background music. It makes about as much sense as anything else you'll see or hear, like a pudgy blonde ninja with a long blonde beard. And finally, the headbands are out in force, informing us, the delightfully confused viewer, that a "ninja" is battling a "nin -- ja". Classic.If you just can't get enough ninja madness, Ninja Kill will always be here for you.

Ah.....here we are again with yet another formulaic - albeit great fun, cut and splice ninja outing as bequeathed unto us by that master of quality crap, Mr Joseph Lai.Interestingly and quite a rarity in these type of movies, the original film into which the newer ninja segments have been edited is in fact mildly engaging in its own right and actually has a few fairly good scenes to offer. However, I won't bore you with the details of that...no.....you want to know about the ninja action right?Well it's brightly coloured for starters.....oh yes.....in fact so bright are the luminous togs that these guys are wearing, it will probably necessitate you to wear sunglasses!Genre regular Richard Harrison once again plays a character named Gordon who (as always in these films) every now and then throughout the movie, battles various disposable ninja cronies. At the films climax, as per usual, he must face the head evil ninja played here by that perennial bad guy (and endearingly atrocious actor!) Stuart Smith.As regards this climatic duel - Smith's demise is certainly noteworthy as its brought about via the utilisation of a pair of cymbals!!! Yes you did indeed read that correctly!What can I say? - Tremendous fun from start to finish and a must for fans of bad movies!

Ninja Kill is another Richard Harrison hachet job, but remarkably, Ninja Kill asserts itself as a film from what must be at least three source films. A profound lack of connection between the stories of the ninjas and the drug/gun/women runners in Thailand/Malaysia extends all the way to the eyeball-searingly different film stock.Some absolutely remarkable moments make Ninja Kill perhaps the greatest cheese Ninja epic outside of Ninja vs. Mafia.Our hero leaps from the back of a galloping yak and shoots two thugs with a six-shooter before he hits the ground. The stunt, incredibly, despite all odds, looks fantastic.The gang-rape scene is more of a violation of the audience than the victim.Some spoilers concerning the ending, so avoid this paragraph if you don't wish to have the completely nonsensical ending ruined.The climax is cinema's finest moment, as far as I am able to discern into the future. Two ninjas (not really identified) sprint to the top of different hills to ersatz japanopop and upon reaching the top, bellow "NINJA" at each other, complete with wild zoom shots. They flip forward, which according to the Richard Harrison School of Ninja, means you teleport into battle. They fight exceedingly poorly for all of 20 seconds, and then our boy RH flips out of scene, backwards, and 'THE END' pops up brutally with a clash as the tape cuts out.I pray that somewhere there is a copy of this film to fill the image here at IMDb.

As soon as i saw this movie's crude cover-art and oversize box I knew there was something special about it. After picking it up and reading the plot summary which read something like "an army of evil purple ninjas do battle with sadistic yellow ninja to stop an assassination plot", I eagerly handed over the dollar it cost me to buy it. From the very first scene full of bad voice dubbing and overacting and on through the movie which spliced together with unintentional comedic brilliance a cheap Asian action movie and the adolescent ninja musings of lead actor Stuart Smith and co., I was awed, even inspired by its tacked-on audacity. As soon as there's a point in the movie absurd enough to insert an out of left field ninja fight scene, here come the ninjas agreeing to a fight and then disappearing only to reappear in techni-color ninja outfits that look like they were bought in the children's halloween costume aisle at k-mart. Then follows slo-mo shots of our "ninjas" chucking cymbals and surikens at each other where ultimately one color of ninja must die so the other can do a back flip into oblivion. This production co. has put out a plethora of similar tack-on ninja flicks that are equally absurd and hilarious, of which I have seen many. These movies embody the true spirit of the cult website realultimatepower.com. Much praise to visionary mavericks such as these and film-maker Andy Sidaris for spawning a new genre: Action movies so awful they are hilarious.