Very well executed

Simple and well acted, it has tension enough to knot the stomach.

It's an amazing and heartbreaking story.

Strong acting helps the film overcome an uncertain premise and create characters that hold our attention absolutely.

I'm going to start off this review by saying I know my title doesn't make any sense, but f*ck you, I can do what I want. I'm a self proclaimed good movie reviewer online!1!! Before I go on any further, I just want to mention that Quints had a great idea going for it. The film casted child actress Kimberly J Brown in the lead role, which was a really good decision considering her great performance and likability in Halloweentown. She was engaging and charismatic. Besides casting Brown, the film had something else going for it with the plot, which is very unique, especially for a DCOM. To have a plot that involves a family having five kids that become product celebrities while at the same time a teenage daughter must deal with this success is a very different idea. This film started off with some genuinely funny moments that had me cracking up, including the scene where she blows up her entire town in one imaginary moment, and an entertaining idea with Jamie speaking directly to the viewers, which is termed "breaking the fourth wall." I've never seen this before in any kids movie. Unfortunately, this movie had many more flaws than pros. The film slowly but surely spirals into a sh*tstorm of cheese and corn that leaves you feeling disgusted and empty all at once. With the introduction of the character Albert, I knew this film was doomed to be a failure. I also had to skip every scene with emotional, inspirational art teacher guy because he was so annoying and over the top. I disliked him so much I don't even remember what his name was, and he was a pretty major side character in this movie. If they removed this character as well as Albert, this movie would have been so much better! The absolute worst scene in this entire movie is when poor Kimberly J Brown is dressed up as an enormous diaper. Yes, you read that right, a f*cking diaper. Wow. I literally face palmed when I saw this due to the sheer stupidity of this decision on the filmmakers part. What the literal f*ck were they thinking? That moment cemented for me how awful this movie truly is. Also, can we just talk about Fiona? GOD DAMN was this woman obnoxious and unnecessary. You know what? I take back what I said. The plot of this movie is ridiculous. Expecting an entire DCOM to be entertaining and unique for kids to engage them the entire time with the plot of a family just having five babies and struggling financially and emotionally with this is a horrid idea. Kids like movies that take them to another world, like Halloweentown, and are completely original and magical. They want actual entertainment, not normal familial struggles that are boring even in real life. Go watch Halloweentown, also starring Kimberly J Brown, which is also a DCOM classic for a reason. Quints is not, also for a good reason. The performances from Jamie's parents are what really make this movie cheesy as hell. Where did these people come from, where did they go, why did the dad end up in "Soaked in Bleach" as a cop, and what the hell were the script writers snorting up their hairy nostrils when they wrote this movie? I had vague deja vu while watching this, but never fully remembered it. I guess my brain blocked out the trauma of how horrible this movie viewing experience was for me as a child. Please spare yourself and your children of this horrid movie. Thanks.

Jamie (Kimberly J. Brown) is a high school student who is enjoying her life. She's loving it so much, she's constantly talking to the audience, bragging about how great everything is, similar to the new series at the time "Malcom in the Middle". She is shocked, but still annoyingly happy, when she finds her parents (especially her mother) are pregnant, and even more a delight is to be found when they reveal it's not one baby but five, hence the title of this stupid Disney made for TV movie, "Quints". The babies become too much, so they hire a strict, short lived nanny, Fiona. Fiona is an example of a character that is extremely over the top, but still somewhat works comically, played by forgotten ex-SNL member Robin Duke. Jamie starts trying to help with the babies. The babies then become a big TV hit, and chaos ensues, though laughter and fun is what I believe the director was going for.This movie will only appeal to young kids, which is the only audience it must be going for, so in this way it works. Kimberly J. Brown is certainly a charismatic lead, but her constant toothy smile, followed by her stereotypical "put the eyes and head down" sad face get old real fast, as do her monologues to the audience. The movie often goes for a surreal feel, including unrealistic daydreams which require good special effects, but here the special effects are terrible. The entire movie shouts out "Disney Channel Movie", which in turn in shouting out, "Mediocrity!"This is a dumb movie, and not great for anyone, but little kids will probably enjoy it.My rating: ** out of ****. 80 mins. G.

First off, I just have to say that this movie has comedy, it has the ability to be charming, it is dramatic at some points, and it is a little sad. Kimberly J. Brown is very good at playing Jamie, as she was brilliant at playing Marnie in both of the exquisite and remarkable Halloweentown films. She possesses a very friendly format to the movie. She narrates it and tells the story with detail. It has more depth to it than most other Disney Channel Original Movies. Jamie's friends are Zoe, (Shadia Simmons) and Brad (Jake Epstein). They comfort Jamie and help her through her "quintastic" time. The parents of Jamie play their roles much better than parents in other movies I have seen. They both lead very busy and productive lives and tend to ignore Jamie. This movie had most everything I could ask for in an 80 minute time frame. If it seems worth it to see, I recommend you do. It gallantly deserves a 10 out of 10. I think because it just keeps you watching.

This film is Disney at its worst.Every cast member in this movie lacks acting talent with the exception of Don Knotts.The plot line is the worst yet of the Disney channel Original movies(Even though they all suck).I also find it incredibly annoying when Kimberly J. Brown stops the movie to explain something totally irrevelent to the plot line.This move is quite possibly the worst move I've ever seen!