disgusting, overrated, pointless

Better Late Then Never

This movie tries so hard to be funny, yet it falls flat every time. Just another example of recycled ideas repackaged with women in an attempt to appeal to a certain audience.

.Like the great film, it's made with a great deal of visible affection both in front of and behind the camera.

I am a "Dolph completist" like another reviewer put so eloquently, yet this movie has left a bitter aftertaste. It could have been so much more, the story had potential to make the ultimate "The Thing"- meets-"X files" crossover, laden with spooky claustrophobia and an intriguing time-travel tale.Alas, none of that has come about. The director is partly to blame for his total failure to bring focus and atmosphere to the story. Viewers are left less than ensnared. But what I found most appalling was the ACTING ! It's incredible how most of the cast just stands there, glazed over, rattling off their lines. How hard can it be to get a little immersed in the role ?Dolph himself is enough of a professional to put in his routine quality, even when he finds himself in what looks like a high school project. I also enjoyed Jamie Treacher, who makes the most of his "pothead" part. And there's David Jean Thomas who manages to bring a natural performance as Doc. But the rest of the cast should be forced to attend drama school !

Combine "The Terminator" with its travel back in time premise to save the future and "Die Hard" about one many against many gunmen, and you have the basics for Christopher Kulikowski's unconvincing but entertaining sci-fi saga "Retrograde" with Dolph Lundgren battling to save Earth from a global biological disaster with some maniac zombies thrown into the mix. There is nothing wrong with the plot, but Kulikowski has to work on such a threadbare budget that the film fails to grab you where it counts. John Foster (Dolph Lundgren) and a space ship full of heavily armed soldiers, including Dalton (Joe Montana) are dispatched from 200 years into the future to Antarctic where a ship is trapped in the ice. They see a meteor land in the frozen wastelands and tromp out to collect samples, little realizing the tragic mistake that they are making. Talking about tragic mistakes, Renee (Silvia De Santis of "Artemisia") leaves her toddler to take off on this historic voyage. Later, as she lies dying in the snow, with their ship sinking, she knows that she made a mistake. Of course, heroic Dolph saves the day, not once but twice! Gary Daniels co-stars but is wasted. The close-quarters combat fights register as lackluster. Presumably, they didn't have a stunt coordinator or they wanted to make double sure than nobody got hurt. Nevertheless, the thesping is quite good and the crew of the ship look like they actually know each other. Overall, "Retrograde" is an imaginative but shoddy movie because the budget doesn't make its science fiction believable. The settings are okay, but the special effects are less than special.

Dolph Lundgren vehicles have hit DVD every spring for the last few years. Apparently they have done well enough that some studio finally snagged this sci-fi time travel flick that has been sitting on the shelf since completion in 2003. John Foster (Lundgren) pilots a space craft from 2204 back to the 21rst century with the crew's mission to stop scientists from discovering plague carrying meteorites in Antarctica. Naturally, there are traitors on board who want to alter the future for their own personal gains and it is up to Dolph to stop them. This is pretty bad, thanks mostly to the flat direction by Christopher Kulikowski. The guy has no concept on how to stage or film a fight scene. And who casts martial artist Gary Daniels and doesn't give him a big fight scene? Even more disappointing when you see former PM Entertainment exec Joseph Merhi is a producer on this. The acting is uniformly bad with Joe Sagal (as a rich dude funding the scientific expedition) and Ken Samuels (as the boat captain) being the stand outs. Seriously, how do guys this bad get cast and maintain some semblance of a career? One has to wonder if working with such a poor director is what finally made Dolph decide to step behind the camera (his directorial debut was the film made right after this). He has directed 4 films since RETROGRADE and the three I've seen have been infinitely more entertaining than this.

I do not rate a movie a "1" unless it is *offensively* bad, and trust me, this one qualifies.The writing, directing, and editing are comically horrid; many scenes are so badly done that you break out laughing, and no, it's not intentional! Washed-up Dolph is not being paid enough here to even pretend to act, and none of the other actors are helping.The only thing that is half-decent is the special effects, or rather, the sci-fi bits from the future, and the passable intro with the meteors hurtling through space and plunging into the Earth.Everything else about this movie is a total loss and a total waste of life. Don't bother. Please.