This Movie Can Only Be Described With One Word.

Don't listen to the negative reviews

At first rather annoying in its heavy emphasis on reenactments, this movie ultimately proves fascinating, simply because the complicated, highly dramatic tale it tells still almost defies belief.

The tone of this movie is interesting -- the stakes are both dramatic and high, but it's balanced with a lot of fun, tongue and cheek dialogue.

I have only looked at the recent short from Rifftrax and, from what I saw, to give this zero-budget 'thing' any stars should be a crime; since IMDb requires a minimum of 1, that's all it could 'possibly' get.Everyone involved with "Rollergator" must have known they were making the equivalent of 'cinematic fecal matter'. Cheap and amateurish in every imaginable aspect of film-making, this pile of celluloid dung's only two redeeming qualities were the presence of the self-loathing (I suspect) Joe Estevez who may have thought:'I know full-well what I'm getting into, but don't care because I'm expected to be in intentionally-crappy films. How awful can I be in this one?') and the not-so-bad-looking blonde actress, Sandra Shuker, although her thespian skills border on non-existent. That's really it, folks. It's that bad.The talking (!) baby alligator puppet would have even been improved by merely sewing eyes on a sock...you'd get the same effect, really. I guess it's all an intentional joke because it looks so obviously-fake. Anyone who's heard of 'Ed the Sock' has seen this before and just as believably; only Ed's perpetual cigar was missing.Saying, 'This is the worst (fill in the blank) I've ever seen, etc.' is asking for it. Something even more horrifically-cheap and stupid may actually be possible...a shuddering thought, considering what I saw of this thing.

Plot summary: a girl tries to keep a puppet away from Joe Estevez, who wants it to exploit it to make money to keep his carnival open. I was able to glean this from other reviews because I really couldn't get that much information from the recording itself.At least Joe Estevez was kind enough to shout all his unintelligible lines so you can make out the word "wiener" once in a while. It seems like this movie was made by this method: 1. Donald Jackson went to his job as a janitor at a carnival and accidentally left his belt-buckle spy camera on the whole time. 2. He watched it and thought it seemed kind of boring so he dubbed loud acoustic guitar music over the whole thing. 3. He added credits and called it a movie.I don't know whether you'd call this a spoiler or not, but the rollergator is a puppet that the main character carries around with her. It doesn't do any rollering. So the name is a bit of a reach. I would have gone with "Backpackpuppet" if I were in charge of naming it. If you didn't know Joe Estevez was an actor of sorts who probably required payment, you could reasonably believe this recording was made for free. Maybe he didn't know he was in it. That would explain some things.Still. A better love story than Twilight.

Well, if the title hasn't already clued you in, just a basic outline of the "plot" should be enough to help you decide if this is the kind of film you would ever be interested in watching: young girl (around 18-20) who likes roller-blading befriends a purple TALKING baby alligator and tries to protect him from a greedy carnival owner who wants to use the verbally-not-challenged creature as a sideshow freak. She is helped by a female karate instructor and another, even younger roller-blading girl equipped with a mean little slingshot. The apathy with which everyone accepts the existence of a talking alligator is a surreal element, but mostly the movie is concerned with trying to be funny, and rarely succeeds. It is made with all the production values and technical elegance of an amateur home video, but the most annoying thing about it must be the soundtrack, which has guitars playing literally non-stop, from the first second to the last, and sometimes so loudly you can't even hear the dialogue (not that you miss much!). Despite all that, it's hard to fully hate this film, maybe because it clearly aims so low and proudly wears its cheapness on its sleeve. Or maybe because Sandra Shuker is such a sweetie-pie. (*1/2)

It infuriates me that whoever gave the director of this movie funding to make this film got so taken in. I can only hope that "legendary" film director Donald G. Jackson (of Hell Comes to Frogtown "fame") embezzled the majority of the production costs for a used Ford Fiesta or something.Make no mistake, this is not an example of "so bad it's good," this movie is "so bad it's melting my eyes and ears." Speaking of melting ears, the soundtrack is hands down the worst ever. It entails someone playing acoustic guitar (amplified) throughout the duration of the entire film (except for occasional pee and water breaks). The music has zero to do with what's going on-screen, and about 10 minutes in I was suspicious that might even be a sound loop.But worst of all is that you can't hear about 40% of the dialogue because there is music drowning it out.Not that you *would* want to hear the music. From what I can tell, the story consists of a baby, "rapping(and we use that term lightly here)", purple alligator has gotten lost. I couldn't get far enough into the movie to actually see it roller skate(I had an immense headache after an hour and ten minutes of watching the film), but apparently it does... eventually.The film *seems* to be designed for kids. What with all the skateboarding Ninjas & slingshotting little girls. But the main character in the movie is dressed in a sports bra and extremely skimpy biker trunks. Meanwhile most of the film's cinematography seems to entail zooming in on the girl's belly button while she skates around.I really don't want to spend anymore time talking about this film. Its offensive it was ever made, and I really wish I had never seen it.