You won't be disappointed!

Really Surprised!

Absolutely the worst movie.

It is neither dumb nor smart enough to be fun, and spends way too much time with its boring human characters.

The only spoiler in this review is that this movie sucks. I wish I had that spoiler before I wasted my night on it. It's basically some douche watched Trick R Treat and thought, "Hey, that doesn't look too hard," and then made a ***crud*** movie. Trick R Treat is an 8. This is a 2 at best. I wouldn't ever stoop to padding my comment to reach the minimum length, but this trashpile is lucky I've wasted 6 lines and 48 seconds even mentioning it. Ugh.

This is an anthology film with 10 segments (which is a lot considering its runtime--13 minutes a segment). Most of them are short and involve classic Halloween staples. They kind of relate at the end--a bit too late. Quick hits of the segments, here we go:Sweet Tooth- One of those myth-y types where characters talk about some ancient homegrown "legend" that comes true like 5 minutes later for the first time ever. Solid blood and gore, but hopefully just a prelude to the good times ahead.The Night Billy Raised Hell- A strange and silly piece. It's got a nice twist. Perfectly fine in it's minor-ness, though I'm not sure it raises enough "hell".Trick- Hmm what? A twist in search of some wit, fun, and terror.The Weak and the Wicked- A boy summons a demon to beat up some bullies (you know, the kind that burn down houses with parents in them for fun). They don't believe him. Then the demon kicks ass. What actually kicks ass is the costume used for the demon. No CGI there. Too bad we don't get to enjoy it more.Grim Grinning Ghost- Another ancient legend come to life story. Yawn. There's a few nice shots, but really atmosphere like this is near impossible to build in 13 minutes and it builds to nothing anyway.Ding Dong- This one feels a tad sexist. I don't use that term lightly but all this is about is a woman who can't be a mom so she turns into a witch/bitch/demon and eats kids and dogs and stuff. Literally nothing else.This Means War- Finally some good fun with a solid premise that shouldn't be drawn out beyond 13 minutes anyway. It's like those stupid Xmas movies about neighbors fighting over their house's decorations, except this time at Halloween and with an ensuing bloodbath.Friday the 31st- Holy hell yeah. This is what this film needed more of. It drops you right in the middle of a classic horror movie scene (power tool wielding psycho chasing buxom lass) and then completely flips the switch in a way that no actual film could (the premise isn't sustainable). Mid-fight alien invasion! And then Evil Dead style wackadoo limb chop battle.The Ransom of Rusty Rex- Other segments start to show again here (too late) and it has a solid funny premise. It's not nearly delirious enough in the back half but it's fun for a while (and when you're talking 13 minutes that's really saying something, or nothing maybe, depending on how you look at it).Bad Seed- Finally, killer pumpkins. That's all Halloween is really about, why did this take so long to get to? Besides the final shot being some lame-brain Raiders reference it's Halloween at its loopiest and also its most sincere. Boo.

Tales of Halloween... Campy as Hell!! OK, you do not want to watch this if you are looking for an actual Halloween/scary movie. The dialogue is horrible, the acting is horrible, the special effects were horrible. Yet, overall, the movie wasn't bad. Some of the stories had me laughing like crazy, some were really silly and some had me thinking ""What the heck am I watching?? Truth is, I like ridiculous stories. It even got the 7/10 rating because one of the tales reminds me of Evil Dead (the original and Best with Bruce Campbell, not the crap they called a remake). Watch a couple of the stories before you dismiss this movie entirely. You never know....

Terrible horror anthology...well, horror comedy anthology, I guess, since there's a lot of attempts at being funny in this. Almost all of the stories here fall flat. The best of the lot being the second story, "The Night Billy Raised Hell," with Barry Bostwick as a devil (or THE devil, I don't know which) who teaches a boy how to do proper pranks on Halloween. It's got a few good chuckles in it but it's nothing particularly special. The rest of the stories are borderline unwatchable. Others have compared this to kiddie things like R.L. Stine stories and I guess I can see that. I'm not sure if that was intentional on the part of the directors involved, most of whom have more straightforward horror creds in their resume. Anyway, perhaps there is a market for this and I'm just not in it. I thought it was really bad, both as horror and comedy.