It's a good bad... and worth a popcorn matinée. While it's easy to lament what could have been...

There's a more than satisfactory amount of boom-boom in the movie's trim running time.

I think this is a new genre that they're all sort of working their way through it and haven't got all the kinks worked out yet but it's a genre that works for me.

One of the film's great tricks is that, for a time, you think it will go down a rabbit hole of unrealistic glorification.

The Benchwarmers has always been one of my favorite comedies from Happy Madison. It felt like a good mix of The Bad News Bears, Revenge of the Nerds, and Happy Gilmore. Rob Schneider does probably one of his best performances here. In most other movies I've seen him in. He's either an ethnic stereotype or a complete weirdo. But here he plays a guy who could actually stand up for himself and others along with being good at baseball. Plus his character arc in this is very good.

The Benchwarmers is about as dimwitted and sophomoric as you come to expect from a comedy produced by Adam Sandler. This movie marks yet another attempt by a comedic trio trying to garnish laughs through absent-minded humor ranging from fart jokes, to pee jokes, to seemingly nonstop slapstick gags that may have been funny when watching 'The Three Stooges' back in the 60s. Nowadays, those jokes just fall flat. Stepping the foot into the main roles are Rob Schneider and David Spade, allies of the Adam Sandler filmography, and Jon Heder, who gained popularity for his role in 'Napoleon Dynamite'. And if these actors prove anything here, it is that juvenile humor including jokes of the scatological category just aren't funny anymore, unless you are an elementary schooler where that humor is sadly still popular in that demographic. If there are any benefits raised from this slapdash comedic, it is that there are just a few laughs, but they come few and far in between. This film follows Gus (played by Rob Schneider), a man with a low-paying job and a wife named Liz (played by Molly Sims); not much else. After beating a group of kids who he witnesses bullying a poor little boy in a game of baseball, he and his friends Clark (played by Jon Heder), a paperboy, and Richie (played by David Spade), a video store clerk, form a baseball team and play in a tournament against Little League teams, and recruit a millionaire techno geek Mel (played by Jon Lovitz) as their coach. There are plenty of comedies with sports serving as the narrative core that manage to shower in some clever laughs and charm to invite moviegoers in for a good time. This movie is not one of them. The best time this film has to offer to shooting a few somewhat funny jokes once every fourth time the characters on the baseball field making fools out of themselves. The main problem is that these actors seem to have nothing better to do than to plunge deep into dull sophomore humor to the point where you feel like your brain cells slowly depleting as the movie goes on. It soon becomes a continuous and almost predictable streak of how many times Jon Heder's character bangs his head or whacks himself with the bat from just being plain silly. And for the lowest common denominator, several scenes of characters farting another character's face. Unless you are a child in elementary school, this comedic gimmick is just not funny. Arguably the actor who delivers the most laughs is Rob Schneider, and his delivery of goods come far and few in between. While this is not his worst role, it certainly isn't one to leave you cheering with laughter. The rest of the actors including Jon Heder and David Spade are given nothing valuable to work with other than to spit loads of obnoxious dialogue, while Nick Swardson is tasked with nothing but to act like a goofy man-child who has fear of being out in the sun each time he makes his way on screen. At the end, the story tries to win your heart by sporting a cheesy little message about the consequences of the bullying. It is a good one, but definitely not one many people haven't heard before. The Benchwarmers is a slapdash sports-themed comedy that suffers from an excess of dimwitted potty humor and dull slapstick gags. This film falls so short of comedic diamonds it willy likely to leave you checking the clock more often than investing your attention to the screen. If one were the edit out this movie and make an online clip consisting of the funny parts, they would be looking at around one minute. Now that is disappointing.

The Benchwarmers (2006): Dir: Dennis Dugan / Cast: Rob Schneider, David Spade, Jon Heder, Jon Lovitz, Nick Swardson: Lame comedy about those who have taken the backseat to the success of others. Rob Schneider, David Spade and Jon Heder form a baseball team to face those who have succeeded or sabotaged the opportunity for others. This story is getting older than time itself. We know the drill and so does director Dennis Dugan who, despite improving his ability, still makes terrible films. His resume includes such embarrassments as Problem Child and Happy Gilmore. He seems caught between an emotional theme and harsh humour and only really skilled directors can pull both off well. Here we are suppose to care but we will care more when the credits roll. Schneider actually tries to play it serious and seriously fails because he is unsympathetic. Spade works at a video store where his co-workers wonder who he is. Heder basically plays Napoleon Dynamite delivering the paper. Jon Lovitz plays a billionaire whose home should appeal more but even it doesn't take away from the fact that the film looks cheap. Nick Swardson plays yet another idiot. To stand out his character dines on sunscreen. Its theme of bullying takes a backseat to total idiocy and bathroom humour. Dugan made a lasting impression making a film that should have been benched long before production. Score: 2 / 10

This is quite possibly the worst movie I have never watched. I caught a few minutes of it on TV and realized I had more important things to do with my life. That's why I'm writing this short but informative review. The only thing you need to know about this movie is that Rob Scneider has never been funny. David Spade hasn't been funny since Chris Farley died. Jon Heder is Napoleon Dynamite. Napoleon Dynamite sucks. Don't watch this movie if you like baseball. Don't watch this movie if you like comedy. Don't watch this movie if you like yourself. Do watch this movie if your the densest person that you know. Do watch this movie if you need a lethal dose of the worst, made for comedy soundtrack that pop-punk has to offer. Seriously though watch it. Psych. Don't.