Who payed the critics

Just intense enough to provide a much-needed diversion, just lightweight enough to make you forget about it soon after it’s over. It’s not exactly “good,” per se, but it does what it sets out to do in terms of putting us on edge, which makes it … successful?

The movie turns out to be a little better than the average. Starting from a romantic formula often seen in the cinema, it ends in the most predictable (and somewhat bland) way.

It's a good bad... and worth a popcorn matinée. While it's easy to lament what could have been...

The Vineyard sees fan favourite James Hong return as one of his most loved characters Lo Pan (Big Trouble In Little China) of sorts, in his self directed horror comedy which has a number of Hong Kong stars on board as a vehicle to help kick start their career (which seems to have worked).Reminding me of the classics like Mr. Vampire, Haunted Cop Shop, and We're Going To Eat You; this great wee flick oozes that same appeal as those horror comedy HK classics of the 80's which also features an early role from Michael Wong (Beast Cops, First Option, Royal Warriors) which is comical in itself!Massive Hong Kong producer and director Gordon Chan (2000 AD, The Four Trilogy, Painted Skin) co-produces the feature for Hong, as he creeps out the visitors of his vineyard island, posing as a film producer with a great location.The plot is crazy, yet that's what gives it the same charm of the 80's HK films I love. Zombies, gore, comedy, crazy SFX all come together in this unseen, underrated little gem that entertains without you having to think too hard!

Dr. Elson Po (James Hong) is one of the world's most famous wine growers. He has a magic potion which has kept him handsome and alive during the centuries. However, lately the magic which rejuvenates him seem to be less and less effective.This film was written by, directed by and starring James Hong. So if you are a Hong fan, this is the picture for you -- he brings an angle to horror that I certainly have not seen elsewhere. I am not sure if you can call him Chinese-American, since he was born in the United States, but he has made an American film with Chinese roots -- possibly a unique feat in American horror.Some of this was pure 1980s. Hong's dance in the mask at his 1980s party was pretty weird, and the music certainly amplified the weirdness. The special effects range from good to bad. I liked the masks and makeup, but some of the "electricity" just looked terrible.

James Hong (Lo Pan from Big Trouble in Little China) wrote, directed and stars in this surprisingly well made and entertaining fantasy horror film. I am almost certain the only reason why Hong pulled a triple threat (writing, directing, starring) was so he could grope and molest the so-called actresses. He sorta pulled a Bill Hinzman in "Flesheater". But truth be told...the nudity makes the film a bit more watchable.The film opens with Hong and his much younger wife standing on the balcony of his mansion as they make out. The wife strips and a horny mechanic watches them from downstairs. Within the first 5 minutes of the movie you get to see a dungeon filled with half naked chicks who are chained up and two separate sex scenes! There is some funny dialog and the film's production does look well done. But "The Vineyard" is trash...but at least it's entertaining trash.Highlights: A martial arts master handy man, tons of boobs, a decapitation, spiders in mouths, snakes wrapped around hot ladies, zombies who can only be killed by sprinkling magic dirt on them, a gay old German guy, the guy from "Legacy of Rage" that isn't Brandon Lee, some really terrible dancing, and a dude going Rambo with a bow and arrow.

My Gooooood! I'm just tired to repeat this eternal question: Why was this movie ever made? This is worse than Troll 2, worse than Witchery and Crawlers, it sucks. All the characters and "actors" (they're unique, they have done only this feature)are involved in this story only because they will be victims. This movie just hurts. Zombie make up is cheap and acting and script are hopeless... Total failure!