Load of rubbish!!

A Brilliant Conflict

This movie was so-so. It had it's moments, but wasn't the greatest.

The biggest problem with this movie is it’s a little better than you think it might be, which somehow makes it worse. As in, it takes itself a bit too seriously, which makes most of the movie feel kind of dull.

Since Casey Kasem died recently, I've been on a binge to watch as much of his movies I could find on the internet. I watched this one on the Internet Archive. Casey is the mission control officer talking to the astronauts which consists of three men and three women. Oh, and the only other familiar face in this low-budget flick to me was Mike Farrell, pre-TV "M*A*S*H", as a reporter at a press conference. Not much action, except for a near-rape, and the dialogue is mostly exposition and some cheezy screaming among the women. One of them has my favorite line about "stud poker"! Overall, this was pretty boring, so much so I keep checking the timer on the screen to find out how much was left! Still, I loved seeing the late Kasem doing his thing on screen as well as stock footage of a rocket lifting off and a disaster from possibly another movie so for that, Doomsday Machine is at the least worth a look.

Warning: Spoiler, if 'spoiler' means that warning you that the ending of the film makes no sense spoils anything.This loopy, cheese-ball pile of gumpf involves the Chinese having a Doomsday device (discovered by a girl throwing a cat at a dog for real) and then us cutting to NASA, where a planned tripped to Venus is slightly altered to include three females. Why? No one is told just yet, but our seven astronauts head out into space, guided by Casey bloody Kasem, and shortly afterwards the Earth explodes in a craptastic display of bad effects.Our seven 'heroes' are all shocked and stuff by this, and it becomes evident that the good old US of A had the foresight to have a mixed sex crew head for Venus and restart the human race. Let it slide that Venus has 2000 mph winds and a sulphuric acid atmosphere (they probably didn't know that when the film was made), and marvel instead at the interior of this ship, which is rainbow coloured inside for no reason whatsoever. Also try and ignore that various ships that are meant to present the one ship these people are in (or else you'll have a fit trying to figure it out).Our crew involve three young guys (one a complete mental case), three 'young' women, and an old guy. Turns out that the Earth exploding has put a dampener on their plans to get to Venus as the radiation will render them sterile by the time they get there, so they'll have to lose four crew and a lot of baggage before they get there or else face having duff knackers! Luckily the mental case manages to kill himself and a girl in a botched sexual assault that involves an airlock and hilarious 'floating around' effects.This is where the film suddenly decides the viewer is not worth actually giving a satisfying ending, as two of the crew end up stranded in space, find a Soviet module, and turn into completely different actors doing nothing but pressing buttons for ten minutes while nothing happens. Wait till you get a load of the non-ending! I'm not sure if telling you that the folks on Venus basically tell them to bolt and fire them into space will ruin the film for you or not, so I won't tell.Hilariously, truly bad film so full of cheese it could be a stuffed crust pizza, with some endurance test sequences, awful effects, and general shabbiness. I kind of liked it, in a way.

Wow! I had low expectations after watching Santa Claus vs The Martians on the humor of Cinematic Titanic, but I am a believer now, these guys are really funny! I like the gags off the film too, something I miss on Rifftrax. Frank absolutely cracked me up more then once and the film in general was very interesting and then totally disintegrated which was really fascinating! I read the history on IMDb, love watching unfinished films that get spliced together with other unfinished films! 10 of 10 awesome! Spoiler: I could watch this film without the riffing it was very interesting to me. I mean it is the perfect combination of cheesy and erotic and science fiction I was really into it, that is up until the film ran out of money and it's ending was vaporized in a spliced footage. Reminded me of They Saved Hitlers Brain, another must see. It does not deserve a 1 star as it's very interesting and the spliced footage makes it a curiosity to watch more. I refuse to rate it on a 1 to 10 scale because it doesn't deserve either grade but as a Cinematic Titanic episode I'm staying with a score of 10, very very funny!There are 10 Cinematic Titanic films on Hulu to watch for free (with around 6 or so commercial breaks) I think Hulu Plus is commercial free but I'm not sure.

About six minutes goes by before a single word is spoken in this. From that point on you often find yourself wondering why they started the dialogue - or even the movie for that matter. Basically, this is a bunch of unknown actors (although Mike Farrell in his pre-MASH days pops up as a reporter who speaks 2 or 3 lines) fighting their way through a weak script and ending up with a movie that's - well - pretty bad. Basically, China has invented some sort of weapon that can destroy the earth, and a mission to Venus is sent off early (with three women replacing three crew members) in order to avoid the destruction. The new crew's mission? To procreate and make sure humanity survives the destruction. There were a handful of moments that created uncertainty, and a real question of who was going to end up surviving once it was discovered that only 3 of the 7 in the crew could actually get to Venus. But then a bad movie turns dreadful with an ending that - to me at least - made absolutely no sense whatsoever. This really isn't worth wasting your time with. Really. It isn't!