the leading man is my tpye

Masterful Movie

Highly Overrated But Still Good

The movie really just wants to entertain people.

Talky, ponderous sci-fi is about twenty-minutes overspent in my opinion, and while it does a fair job in painting the isolation of a remote band of people discovering the human race may have become extinct in the wake of an alien invasion, it does little to fulfil the promise when action is needed.Director Rebane has a solid concept, and his cast of amateurs do a creditable job (notably Bentzen and Holt) with a heavy emphasis on dialogue and building a sense of intrigue out of a flickering red light and interference on a ham radio. The landscape is attractive and while there are a couple of moments where the pace gets above ambling, it's an effort to reach the climax (which while unexpected, doesn't redeem the previous 95 minutes of hard-talking labour).One of those films that promises much in its narrative build-up, dangling the juicy plot carrots, displaying an attractive ambition that is ultimately never realised; and when you discover that it was never on the negative and certainly never on the page, you become (understandably) quite aggrieved that you invested almost two hours of your precious life for such a blatant ruse. I wanted "They" to live up to its potential, and disappointingly, though it's picturesque and moody, it doesn't come to fruition.

Bill Rebane's first film proper (as far as I know), and I was half curious about it, half dreading it since I'd read nothing good about it. Sure, it's as low budget as you can get, has questionable acting and has little going on, but is it really that bad? The answer is: Probably. After some red mist appears and people begin falling dead in the street, we cut to hunter Jake and his sister, who were putting up three students who are now ready to return to civilisation via plane. However, once heading for the airport they are prevented from stopping by a sick man who then collapses on the runway. Jake takes the students to the next airport and finds it deserted, where they also witness a plane crash.Our students are Eric, Dan (whom you'll be shouting 'kill him first' as he's the joker of the pack) and a guy either called Tom or Sam (I don't remember). Tom, let's call him, is the cynical one who wants to get back to society, even after witnessing strange red light bouncing about the place. Dan on the other hand is full of theories as to what's happening, although to me it sounded like he was making stuff up off the top of his head.They all head back to Jake's cabin where the film settles down good and proper for a whole load of nothing. They try the radio, look for food, try the radio again. Sometimes a mysterious voice contacts them asking where they are (I'll admit these bits were quite effective). And just when you're cutting this film a whole lot of slack, you run into the last half hour when things take a complete nose dive when the remaining people decide to wander around outside for the rest of the film until the completely bizarre ending.Add to this the Kraftwerk style take off of The Good, The Bad and the Ugly theme tune, those hilarious flying saucers and shots of people running around panicking, the random TV show, and most of all Dan (Or Stan) giving a brain melting speech about how Mars and Earth were right next to each other at some point, and you've got a film that cranks the weirdness up to ten. The fact that things almost happen sometimes is about as much 'action' as you're going to get here, as very little happens. There's also some bizarre hint at some point that Jake killed his father somehow to get insurance money that crops up from nowhere and is never mentioned again.Fans of things happening in films are going to fall into a coma with this one. Fans of Bill Rebane will need to see it anyway just to see where it all started. Fans of bad movies will have to see it to see some of the most inept aliens ever…I wouldn't say seen…I'll say hinted at – smoke bombs and flashing lights.

It's the end of the world with aliens invading and a mysterious plague spreading! But don't worry, Bill Rebane is here, he'll make sure things don't get scary or exciting or even interesting. You're trapped in a cabin with the most boring people in the world (maybe being dull is some kind of immunity?). Occasionally we'll cut away, once to a smarmy talk-show guy who prattles on cheerfully about the plague before introducing his befuddled guests, then to a bar with a comical drunk, and a couple of times to a bad DJ and some fleeing crowds. Most of the time, though, we're stuck with these terrible actors. The guy with the beard, seriously, he's just flat-out awful. When he tries to be romantic or funny, he makes the whole universe worse. Couple that with special effects that must have cost eighty-five cents, the most inappropriate music cues ever (I never knew one of those New Year's noisemakers meant "suspense"), dialog that makes you want to strangle your ears, and aliens who ask "How are you?" over the radio. There are two reasons to watch this: the first is the music over the titles. It's such a jaw-droppingly blatant rip-off of Ennio Morricone's "The Good, The Bad and the Ugly" theme that you'll be glad you heard it, just so you can believe it. The second is the ending, which is one of those "Wait, what?" endings that make you think you must have fallen asleep and missed something crucial. You didn't, though.

Once upon a time, I naively believed that a film could be THE WORST simply by its own dubious merit. Years of hearing people describe "Seven Mummies" or "House of the Dead" as THE WORST eventually changed my mind... these are notably bad movies, but are enjoyable enough despite/because of this, and thus cannot possibly be THE WORST. 'No,' I reasoned, 'a movie can only truly be called THE WORST by disappointing its audience. The many sub-subpar giallo attempts must truly be THE WORST for offering a glimmer of tasty material, tricking us with what seems like a tense build-up, and finally, cruelly, robbing us of any payoff.' This philosophy carried me through many a night of terrible-movie-watching.Then... I saw "THEY".I had no expectation, unlike my viewings of "Kill, Baby, Kill" or "Silent Night, Bloody Night." Had I been less than entertained, I would have thought nothing of it. I received the movie as part of a 50-movie pack (from Mill Creek) and only put it on to pass the time. And yet, something happened.Aside from the plot and effects there was nothing overtly laughable about this movie. The acting was far from the worst I've seen, and the locations were believable if a bit cheap. Nothing immediately sparked my interest (aside from a mention of "bizarre creatures" in the DVD blurb) nor pointed out that this movie would be shockingly, horrifying dull. But this was far from Middle Of The Road bad. It was abysmal. It both terrified and sedated me. I suppose many could have slept through this, saving themselves the trouble of figuring out why such apparently total devastation resulted from such minor vandalism (perpetrated by such teensy, frail saucers). Only the bearded hippie's mind-scrambling "logic" kept me awake long enough to witness the utterly flabbergasting ending. A few questions remain: -What was that light? -What caused the humorous loss of motor control exhibited by various character? -Where was Eric crawling to for half an hour? -Why did God not mercifully strike me down before witnessing the last minute? -Who--dear god, WHO would fund this??I've been enlightened. This is THE WORST movie I have ever seen, despite my lack of expectations. I'm infected with rage at how bad it was. My girlfriend is literally showing symptoms of poisoning. Even a Torgo couldn't salvage this boring, sniveling, half-assed, hick/hippie-oriented sack of filth.Goonfactor: practically nonexistent, spiking to extremely high in the last ten seconds.