recommended

An action-packed slog

The film was still a fun one that will make you laugh and have you leaving the theater feeling like you just stole something valuable and got away with it.

It’s not bad or unwatchable but despite the amplitude of the spectacle, the end result is underwhelming.

In a dystopian near future, single people, according to the laws of The City, are taken to The Hotel, where they are obliged to find a romantic partner in forty-five days or are transformed into beasts and sent off into The Woods. So Lobster, well this movie was nowhere near as great as everyone seemed to make it sound, it was very long, boring and perhaps quite stupid. Fat Colin Farrell's belly was very distracting and so was his sex scene or the point where he couldn't even remove his pants. Plus people turn into animals? if they don't mate? Just Horrible. (0/10)

A waist of my life. I wish I had that hour and 58 minutes back so I could do the dishes and a load of laundry and maybe scrub the toilet. Anything would be better than watching this movie.

Collin Farrell knows exactly how to deliver his lines (with a satisfying native Irish accent) in The Lobster. Writer/Director Ygoros Lanthimos must've been giddy behind the camera, as his world of strangeness and deadpan humor was captured. A very promising future is set for the both of them. (See: The Killing of a Sacred Deer. Also see: my coming critique.) It's very refreshing to get a tone of weird, absurdest humor out of otherwise dull language. The way he writes his dialogue in repetitive, robotic flow makes for an intriguing study of the human condition. This is the movie's strongest aspect. Unfortunately, it becomes exhaustive and stretched well passed its welcoming universe. About the halfway mark, we leave the setting that promised obscure and terrifying things to take place, and instead the writer seems to go out of his way to make a more structured message on love. You will find such a message, but it's beaten and kicked to death, leaving the viewer a bit insulted that no confidence was held in him earlier to find it himself.Strange and uncomfortable movies are what I get most revved up about and this certainly had that charm, albeit for a shorter time than its 2 hour running. What really upsets me and irks is the useless interfacing between pointless characters and a reaching climax that rehashes themes attempting to really hone in the message. In my opinion, Farrel, the dark hotel of lonliness and the animal conversion machine could have been cultivated toward a truly shocking twist and utter devastation that would have shaken the audience. Instead, its interesting rhythm fizzles, and we're left with what feels like a pretentious artist sticking with the flat-line tone he should have shed in the second act.

The premise of this movie was actually appealing and it seemed to have potential as a quirky satire. However, this movie is so bad in so many ways that I stopped it about halfway through. The writing is confused; the acting is robotic, the humor isn't very funny and the tone is depressing.I have watched and enjoyed numerous futuristic and post apocalyptic stories. In the good ones, the story revolves around real people struggling with difficult situations. But in this one, based on their reactions to various ridiculous situations, every character in this story behaved as though borderline insane or deranged or drugged. I rated this a 2 instead of 1 for the nice scenery and for Rachel Weiss who is always a pleasure to watch. Both were wasted on this nonsense.A week after watching the first hour, I watched the balance to see if there was anything interesting or thought provoking to take away from this. There was not. My best summary for this is: boring, disturbing, sick, and a waste of time.