The Worst Film Ever

It's easily one of the freshest, sharpest and most enjoyable films of this year.

Story: It's very simple but honestly that is fine.

This movie feels like it was made purely to piss off people who want good shows

I saw this movie in 2004. So why write a review now, in 2018 you might ask? Well, because I suddenly realized that I was thinking in awe about this movie again, as I have done many times in the past. The sheer joy I feel, the adoration, the memory of experiencing the perfection of ... well, Brat Pitt. And no, I'm not in love with him that wouldn't be related to the movie. No, it is THIS movie and the performance he gives in this movie. The picture that is portrayed of the demi-God Achilles will always stay with me and I have to thanks Brat Pitt for doing that. What has stayed with me all those years are especially the fight scenes; the WAY he fights. The fact that he is so good at it that... well, no spoilers. I've always considered the requirements for a 10/10 to be: Everything has to be perfect: the story, the music, the special effects, the main character, hell - my requirements for a 10 has been that I need to fall in love with the main character, buy posters of the movie and go see it three times in a theatre; and I don't remember any of that... but if a movie manages it to make think about with strong emotions of thrill, still yearning for that same experience again as if it was a drug that I got addicted to after a single use FOURTEENS YEARS after I saw it... then it deserves a 10 too. Cheers Brat, you made it to my short list of "immortal" people.

Having seen the theatrical version, I thought to give the director's cut an opportunity at winning me over. Totalling at a gargantuan 196 minutes, the additional 30 minutes of swords and sandals certainly justify the elongated runtime. But alas, even with all the blood and guts, it's hindered by a lacklustre screenplay. Loosely based on Homer's epic poem Iliad, depicting the Trojan War and the sack of Troy, which happens to be Homer's second poem Odyssey. A war of powerful greed, lustful pride and embellishing love, the Trojan War is one of the most famous wars in Greek Mythology. Director Petersen manages to convey the central theme of immortality through vivid battles and ultimatums, with little assistance from Benioff's screenplay. The sheer lack of characterisation, particularly from Paris and Achilles, resulted in a monotonous story about honour. There was no emotion. Understandably it is a period war epic and so the sprawling battles take precedent, and they are entertainingly violent. But when so much time is spent establishing these characters and the relationships between them, you would've thought some emotional resonance should've naturally transpired. Acting was functional, mostly focusing on the physicality of their roles, with Pitt and Bana being the standouts. The duel between Hector and Achilles remains one of the most engrossing battles put to film. The inventive sword and shield choreography was outstanding. Despite having wealthy mythological source material, Benioff managed to make several changes that lead me questioning particular choices, especially condensing a decade long war to a mere week or two. Being a fan of Greek Mythology, I found it difficult to believe certain aspects. Some characters died when they shouldn't have, romances bloomed that didn't exist. Yet, for mainstream audiences that are uninitiated with such backgrounds, this remains a well paced action epic with visceral violence and a solid cast. Just don't expect an honest translation of Homer's poem.

Many a younger generation asked me why is a virus called a Trojan Horse, for those who love Homer or had some Greek mythology subjects, it is a no-brainer and we know why. This film is adapted from the tale about the lovelorn Paris and Helen- the face that launched a thousand ships. But it has been given some imaginative adaptations that Achilles became the center of the story. For all the ladies out there flocking to the cinema because there's finally an excuse to see Brad Pitt again , this time pumped up, rugged, muscular, glistening in sweat it's worth the wait and weren't disappointed. Resplendent cast of actors and as the story narrator, the reliable Sean Bean. Entertaining and admirable.

The movie built up to a climax but Troy never showed up. What gives